Shit Miranda Says

This was bound to be made so why not. Account run by my bestieeeessss

[Shit Miranda Says @shit_reevessays]

I feel like my husband is going to be a protein animal cuz he's so swole

[Shit Miranda Says @shit_reevessays]

I love soggy pizza

[Shit Miranda Says @shit_reevessays]

I wanna be a vet for extreme animals, like a finger monkey

[Shit Miranda Says @shit_reevessays]

I want to do the Michael Jackson reverse

[Shit Miranda Says @shit_reevessays]

I'm gonna Michael Jackson reverse so I can book these jobs

[Shit Miranda Says @shit_reevessays]

I'm the whole package if I showered more

[Shit Miranda Says @shit_reevessays]

I could get off to that voice

[Shit Miranda Says @shit_reevessays]

I couldn't remember if I'm Italian or Irish but I remembered I've been able to say kiss me I'm Irish. So I guess Italian

[Shit Miranda Says @shit_reevessays]

I said something so stupid earlier I don't even know the words

[Shit Miranda Says @shit_reevessays]

I want my name on trump towers

[Shit Miranda Says @shit_reevessays]

I didn't realize Filipino and Asian were like the same thing

[Shit Miranda Says @shit_reevessays]

I would give up my Coachella ticket for a finger monkey

[Shit Miranda Says @shit_reevessays]

New Years resolution: get Harambe back and get a finger monkey

[Shit Miranda Says @shit_reevessays]

I love cinnamon gum more than some humans

[Shit Miranda Says @shit_reevessays]

I want my name on trump towers

[Shit Miranda Says @shit_reevessays]

I almost chased it with coffee creamer

[Shit Miranda Says @shit_reevessays]

My dream job is to marry a dj

[Shit Miranda Says @shit_reevessays]

I swallowed my gum as a chaser

[Shit Miranda Says @shit_reevessays]

Black celebrity crush, chance, white celebrity crush... Josh peck

[Shit Miranda Says @shit_reevessays]

Scrambled eggs and ranch is the shit