Singh 007

Trust me, I’m so much cooler online !!

[Singh 007 @simrandeep_]

50% of marriages end in divorce.
100% of pizza deliveries end in Happiness.
Pizza: 1
Marriages: 0
#reasonsTostaySingle

[DC Mohali @dcmohali]

As a part of abundant precaution, SAS Nagar will be observing black out for next two hours.

[taapsee pannu @taapsee]

If one tweet rattles your unity, one joke rattles your faith or one show rattles your religious belief then it’s you who has to work on strengthening your value system not become ‘propaganda teacher’ for others.

[Singh 007 @simrandeep_]

#FarmersBill

[Gurinder singh @Gurinderoffi]

#Tractor2Twitter #FarmersBill #FarmersProtest2020 watch and share @Tractor2twitr

[Singh 007 @simrandeep_]

@GyanOfGod 2002 other galaxies!

[God @GyanOfGod]

जैसे लूट रही है सब की खुशियां, जहन्नम बन कर रेह गई है ये दुनिया

आधो का कट रहा है चालान और आधो का कट रहा है चूतिया

[Singh 007 @simrandeep_]

My name is on the next mission to Mars: NASA's #Mars2020 Rover. Send your name too! https://t.co/obVjWzkSvV

[Kevin O'Leary aka Mr. Wonderful @kevinolearytv]

It pains me to see great entrepreneurs chasing bad opportunities. If your "GREAT IDEA" is not profitable in 5 years, it's a HOBBY, not a business.

[Harsh @Bhand_Engineer]

Created a profile on Tinder when I was in Bangalore and my bio had Kolkata ↔️ Bangalore on it. Got a match who said she right swiped because she wanted to get a parcel delivered from Bangalore to Kolkata. I've been DTDC-zoned.

[Akshar Pathak @AksharPathak]

Sardarni: "I'm an interior designer"

Sardar: "Changa ji, what's the name of your compa–"

Sardarni: "Interior de Kaur"

[Akshar Pathak @AksharPathak]

[song playing]

Me: "Kaun banata hai itne bakwaas aur ghatiya gaane?"

Song: "It's yo' boy, Badshaah"

[God @GyanOfGod]

I decided not to rest until I create another human being as brilliant as Albert Einstein but It seems I have been unsuccessful. On the contrary, Box office collections of Salman Khan movies keep getting higher and higher.

[Singh 007 @simrandeep_]

@SPradeepKr Care to share the link please?

[Singh 007 @simrandeep_]

Do you remember when you joined Twitter? I do! #MyTwitterAnniversary

[Singh 007 @simrandeep_]

@awesomerawks @MarvelStudios @mihirjain28
Look at this one. 😂😂

[God @GyanOfGod]

People: God, can you please fulfill my wish?

Me:

[Akshar Pathak @AksharPathak]

#WhatsAppDown This dumb piece of shit WhatsApp goes down worldwide and also deleted me from my family jokes group, the forwards of which I thoroughly enjoyed reading and I definitely didn't exit the group myself, the app is so buggy, it was entirely Whatsapp's fault.

[God @GyanOfGod]

This is what happens when someone tries to take my place. Fear me dhongi babas.
#RamRahimVerdict