Alex Sims

Lake bum

[Alex Sims @sims_alex]

“@a_hank: Son, you're teasin' the gorilla in the monkey house.” @Sketchfriendly

[Anti Joke Tyrone @AntiJokeTyrone]

A man runs over a woman...... Who's fault is it?

The man's. He shouldn't be driving in the kitchen.

[SportsCenter @SportsCenter]

RT if you're taking the Heat in Game 7. #HeatWin

[Alex Sims @sims_alex]

Holy shit lebron! @KingJames

[Alex Sims @sims_alex]

“@YOLO_YODA: Obesity problem, the Dark Side has http://t.co/kBHFLmPG7z” @Sketchfriendly check this out!

[Alex Sims @sims_alex]

@mackeyjayy @keshasuxx kesha grabbed my hand and looked me in the eye while singing your love is my drug.. It was instantly true love.

[Alex Sims @sims_alex]

@KarenSkjerning I grow my beard for ke$ha.

[Alex Sims @sims_alex]

People watching at its finest. #frankiesfunpark @Sketchfriendly @MattEvans22

[Alex Sims @sims_alex]

You know what I hate about vacations.. That they end!

[Alex Sims @sims_alex]

Happy birthday to my beautiful mother! Wouldn't be who I am today without her. http://t.co/RbaRJwACMl

[Alex Sims @sims_alex]

@Sketchfriendly pineapples

[Amazing Cars @AmazlngCars]

The nicer you are, the easier you're hurt. So just be a cunt.

[Alex Sims @sims_alex]

Happy birthday nana! Lets make today legen...dary! #suitup http://t.co/Zoc0JnDJ

[Alex Sims @sims_alex]

Why do you have to be so mean?

[Amazing Cars @AmazlngCars]

Liam Neeson trained Batman, Obi Wan, and Darth Vader. He is both Aslan and Zeus…and he punches wolves. Why would you kidnap his family?

[Aziz Ansari @azizansari]

Shoutout to the folks that videotaped fireworks on their phones last night. So glad we have that footage to look back on.

[UberFacts @UberFacts]

Ke$ha's single "Tik-Tok" sold more copies than any single from The Beatles.