thank you for thinking of me sister, dad thank you for writing every day, even if it doesnt make up for the 5113 days you werent there. mom thank you for you pressing, your unbearable love. for not letting me drown in the river of my own thoughts. for reminding me i'm doing good.
i just did the wrist check thing and got scared. isnt it fucking hilarious that i spent most of my teenage years wanting to get skinny but it's only every time i go back into toxic dynamics in my romantic relationships that i start fcking consuming myself & shrinking like a twig?
m here to say just one very heartbreaking truth. im recovered now, food is not smtg i have to consciously think about, but rather a natural habit. organic. yet the disordered thoughs r still there. i didnt really fully accept myself til i was skinny. is it like tht for any1 else?