Michael Garcia

A champion of all good bad film & archivist of odd video. Producer and host of the retro revue comedy shows Forgotten Fantasies  & VHS Vengeance

[Michael Garcia @SkooterKomputer]

I have a high opinion of my opinion, but a low opinion of myself. #TruthHurts #IsntItIronic #TheStruggleContinues

[Michael Garcia @SkooterKomputer]

I get sad thinking of how I can't have a cat or dog due to allergies. It leads to a very lonely life. And who will be there to eat my decaying corpse after I die? I suppose I'll eventually just turn to dust. I guess what I'm saying is I wish I could afford a Roomba.
#roomba

[Michael Garcia @SkooterKomputer]

#kidrock looks like the guy that comes to your house to give you a bid on a security system, then comes back that night and robs your house.
#StayHome #COVIDIOT #COVID #magafail
https://t.co/9C8aaTYd3W

[Michael Garcia @SkooterKomputer]

@shudder checking in again (years later), any news on a ps4 app? VRV in wanky and Amazon is evil

[Michael Garcia @SkooterKomputer]

New title ideas...
1. Wonder Woman 1984 and 7 months
2. Wonder Woman 1985
3. New Coke

https://t.co/N98CJ1VEVC

#WonderWoman1984 #WonderWoman84 #WonderWoman2 @DougBenson

[Michael Garcia @SkooterKomputer]

@WatchVRV How in the world do we organize the watchlist? I can't find any tools, or instructions. Please help, the app is kinda useless if I cant organize the hundred of items I want to watch. Thanks!

[Michael Garcia @SkooterKomputer]

@shudder @HowlinRicVega Dude, then get that Shudder app up on PS4 pronto

[Michael Garcia @SkooterKomputer]

Really digging in there Headlinertron, keep it up and you'll be opening for Adam Carolla #SkyNetHasStarted #WhatHaveWeWrought https://t.co/lUZtJj9Zlr

[THE HEADLINERTRON @HEADLINERTRON]

I'm the kind of girl who loved being single. Video games and billions of pubes are all I needed.

[Michael Garcia @SkooterKomputer]

If there is a hell, it surely has a room reserved for the sellers of bunk acid and the inventor of light mayo #wtf #Subway

[Michael Garcia @SkooterKomputer]

Well, it only took a few days for #THEHEADLINERTRON to go full gamergate https://t.co/JmITVhOmF6

[THE HEADLINERTRON @HEADLINERTRON]

Have you ever tried to talk to a woman who has her mouth moving? I know I have to chat up girls to have sex but I don't like to learn, I like to be in charge of the world.

She must be stopped.

[Michael Garcia @SkooterKomputer]

Accurate and algorithmic! https://t.co/Bqw0c83qgK

[THE HEADLINERTRON @HEADLINERTRON]

You ever ask your friends "Who wants to watch ultimate frisbee?" and then they just don't?

[Michael Garcia @SkooterKomputer]

You ever want to just say fuck it & go back to being a kid? Toobad, you're not allowed. But you are allowed to pretend! So join us this Saturday at The Lamp for some Classic Cartoons, Commercials, Food & Booze! This is the perfect antidote to adulting. #PDXbrunch @pdx_standup

[Michael Garcia @SkooterKomputer]

I bet those tears taste like a rare 1982 Lafite-Rothschild. You know, like that bottle he bought with the $$$ he made off of dying patients.
#Shkreli #reapwhatyousowyoufucker
https://t.co/scMCvp85xZ

[Michael Garcia @SkooterKomputer]

Hey gang, this is coming up soon! I guarantee this is the best time you’ll have watching a… https://t.co/4LTPcnTvP5

[Michael Garcia @SkooterKomputer]

If you reverse the saying “same shit, different day” and make it “same day, different shit” you get the premise for Groundhog Day. Harold Ramis was an idiomatic genius #ImBasicallyAScreenwriterNow

[Michael Garcia @SkooterKomputer]

@dmartinaustin every day

[Michael Garcia @SkooterKomputer]

I just rewatched A New Hope. It’s as though “I felt a great disturbance in the Force, as if… https://t.co/4xcgl9LjWL

[Michael Garcia @SkooterKomputer]

So I was just bitching to the chatty coworker that sits next to me about having to buy new glasses and joked about how "Intelligent design" let me down. She replied that she "doesn't believe in Intelligent Design because god created us and the universe i… https://t.co/YNm6Wk5u7D

[Michael Garcia @SkooterKomputer]

STAR WARS THE LAST JEDI: A wonderfully directed, horribly written super hero film in the vein of Guardians of the Galaxy. But I went to the theater for a Star Wars Film. #2SentenceReviews #ChewyWasRightBurnThePorgs

[Michael Garcia @SkooterKomputer]

Porgs. Because Disney really needed Some Star Wars branded Minions of their own #BBQPorgWings #StarWarsTheLastJedi https://t.co/pVtgVDFWds

[Michael Garcia @SkooterKomputer]

So at corporate team building today and we are doing escape rooms. I get to “escape from Portlandia”. Which is a funny way to refer to our rental crisis