ೃ⁀➷ zen

edtwt , 60kg , t4t

[ೃ⁀➷ zen @spiderscreeping]

account got locked from a tweet from 2 yrs ago lmfao

[ೃ⁀➷ zen @spiderscreeping]

i think life would be so much better if i never got an ed in the first fucking place

[ೃ⁀➷ zen @spiderscreeping]

i'm literally recovered too , for the most part at least . i mean i don't try to starve myself its just i'm in a unhealthy habit of forgetting to eat on my meds rn

[ೃ⁀➷ zen @spiderscreeping]

my perception on whats considered a lot of food is so fucked up , what do you mean i could eat three meals like a normal person , or even just two and feel like i still overate ????

[ೃ⁀➷ zen @spiderscreeping]

bmi went up a ton ,,,, by three points ,,,, i really let myself go

[ೃ⁀➷ zen @spiderscreeping]

i thjnk im relapsing

[ೃ⁀➷ zen @spiderscreeping]

lol im on vyvansee yesss

[ೃ⁀➷ zen @spiderscreeping]

but hey i can focus better

[ೃ⁀➷ zen @spiderscreeping]

disordered thoughts coming back .. i tried one of my bfs vyvanse and i think im gonna talk to my dr abt trying to go on it but im a little worried if i relapse what would happen because everyone ive heard that uses it has like no appetite

[ೃ⁀➷ zen @spiderscreeping]

MY ASS BURNS WHY AM I LACTOSE INTOLERANT AND QLSO JUST HAVE A WEAK ASS STOMACH

[ೃ⁀➷ zen @spiderscreeping]

waking him up n stuff why am i so stupid leave him alone he's tired let gim sleep you suck

[ೃ⁀➷ zen @spiderscreeping]

me when i hypersexualize myself snd then cry about it because im disgusting and i need to die. what do you mean. what do tou mean tonight happened and i was drunk enoivh to not care. why do i loom like this. why cant i like myself. how i look. what i eat. why cant i like anythubg

[ೃ⁀➷ zen @spiderscreeping]

i hate how mu h im disgusted im like barely tipsy i cant stop ceying i cant stop thinku g about everything uve ever done i want to cey so much more i want to be done what if my bf is tired of me what if he hates me because i get too needy. he's trying to sleep n im over here like

[ೃ⁀➷ zen @spiderscreeping]

i actuallt feel trapped i want to break doen but my bf is asleep next to me n i already woke him up once trying to get his attention but hes too tired

[ೃ⁀➷ zen @spiderscreeping]

i hate how i get disordered thoughts the second im left alone to think. by myself. cant sleep. not drunk enough to pass out but too sober to sleep

[ೃ⁀➷ zen @spiderscreeping]

missing how my legs used to look cut up again ciz i saw photos

[ೃ⁀➷ zen @spiderscreeping]

been high 24/7 basically for the past week or so since i got a new pen and its helping me avoid my problems

[ೃ⁀➷ zen @spiderscreeping]

i dont think ill ever have a healthy relationship w food

[ೃ⁀➷ zen @spiderscreeping]

its official im relapsing

[ೃ⁀➷ zen @spiderscreeping]

hes gonna carve his initials into my back