David

I aspire to be the guy who sits at windows, eats his own hair, and yells jinglebells! at passing cats louder and louder until they reply. Big, pretty windows.

[David @spiderspun]

Transitioning to Bluesky. Same spider name, same spider taste, but now with 50% more spiders???

[David @spiderspun]

@MalePersuasion Straight men. In the woods or otherwise.

[David @spiderspun]

I went to lunch almost two hours ago. Mentally, I am still there. (Spiritually, I will be there all week.) #WorkPlaceFunTimes

[Irose @irose_R2]

My impact

[David @spiderspun]

@brianjoralvarez Pretty sure that'd be Mrs Mooney's pie shop. I hear she uses pussycats and toast, but god they're good.

[David @spiderspun]

@nickersdoodle I feel like that's the least they could do after being multiple hours late to a two person event.

[David @spiderspun]

@nickersdoodle They 👏 are 👏 dropped 👏

[David @spiderspun]

@Loop528 @ChrisETeigen But are the seals a friend to you?

[David @spiderspun]

@MalePersuasion You knew exactly what that mouth was doing, and power to you 💪

[David @spiderspun]

@Finnicks_Sugar I think a long and rigorous study into these claims may be required, and I hereby volunteer to conduct and participate in the requisite experiments

[David @spiderspun]

@MalePersuasion Lollipops make for great props. As do receptive mouths.

[David @spiderspun]

@benja_mine In order:
- Green for that classic chef's kiss contrast
- Purple because it's the best flavour
- Orange to lean into your genetic heritage
- Blue goes with everything?

[David @spiderspun]

@benja_mine What games are you playing? 😬

[David @spiderspun]

@sailorgordo Please insert directly into my mouth.

[David @spiderspun]

@DannyW261 Trash that takes itself out is the best kind of trash. You're better off in the long run. 🫂

[David @spiderspun]

@IAmDylanLewis It's definitely giving Big And Tall (complimentary)

[David @spiderspun]

@thomas_violence Important question: did you harmonise?

[David @spiderspun]

@benja_mine Oh my god is it finally here??

[〼 @mas_square]

デジヴァイス

[David @spiderspun]

@nickersdoodle Hello, it me, a Digimon fan! 👋

[David @spiderspun]

@nickersdoodle Three whites from three unrelated events. Somehow the bottles just keep coming home with me 🤷🏻‍♂️

[David @spiderspun]

Wow, I have three open bottles of wine in my fridge. What does this say about me??