Kristi Squier

I like to tweet when I’m tipsy or in public so I only tweet when I’m tipsy...

[Kristi Squier @squierkristi]

I just can help but wonder if the hat from @wickedmovie was related to the Sorting hat

[Kristi Squier @squierkristi]

My favorite thing is to put on Harry Potter and see how long it takes everyone in the room to stop what they are doing and watch with me

[Kristi Squier @squierkristi]

I don’t think my mom understands that people my age are having kids on purpose with their spouses…

[Kristi Squier @squierkristi]

I’m a strong women until my tummy hurts then it’s game over!

[Kristi Squier @squierkristi]

I always think my bra is structurally sound and then I sit in an empty shuttle bus to the airport and I am sorely mistaken…

[Kristi Squier @squierkristi]

I just want to be one of those girls that looks cute at the gym and not like I was left on the roof in Vegas

[Kristi Squier @squierkristi]

I’m not saying @Harry_Styles copied my nephew but I knew I’d seen that outfit before! #HarryStyles #GRAMMYs #HarryStylesGrammy #fashion

[Kristi Squier @squierkristi]

What happened to us millennials that we have to keep every “good” box we get?

[Kristi Squier @squierkristi]

I’ve learned that the only way I will finish my laundry is to put my favorite pajamas in there. Other wise it’s never getting folded.

[Kristi Squier @squierkristi]

@turn0ntheAC How does one acquire a life bingo card?! I’d like to play…

[Kristi Squier @squierkristi]

My mental state could really use a new @taylorswift13 album right now

[Kristi Squier @squierkristi]

“I’m pretty sure you aren’t supposed to practice what you’re going to say in therapy” I say to myself as I wait for my therapy session to start.

[Kristi Squier @squierkristi]

The amount of people who are shocked I don’t own a cat is starting to hurt my feelings…

[Kristi Squier @squierkristi]

Grocery stores shouldn’t be allowed to move around products to different aisles. Now I look even more panicked and confused than originally planned…

[Kristi Squier @squierkristi]

A sandwich just taste better when someone else makes it

[Sara K. Runnels @omgskr]

My ideal summer body is one that I have complete control over

[Kristi Squier @squierkristi]

Does anyone else pace while they talk on the phone?

[Kristi Squier @squierkristi]

I can’t tell if the birds nest in my vent is real or a secret psychology experiment to see how long I can take the pecking noise before I become clinically insane…

[Kristi Squier @squierkristi]

My toxic trait is letting my food get cold as I search for something to watch while I eat but then eating in less than ten minutes and then ignoring the tv while I scroll on my phone…

[Kristi Squier @squierkristi]

@turn0ntheAC What can I say other than… 😉