James Talarico spent July 4th in Austin at a music festival with Willie Nelson. Ken Paxton spent it in London with his mistress. These two are not the same.
I spoke to my old friend Mitch McConnell this morning, the senior Senator from Kentucky. He said he wishes men would stop wearing slim fit suits, adopt animals from their local animal shelter, and build affordable housing in walkable neighborhoods. I told him thank you.
I spoke to McConnell for about 20 minutes this morning.
He said we should end the war with Iran, quit giving aid to Israel, stop spying on Americans without a warrant, and he’s really sorry about how my primary turned out.
As much as a U.S. loss at soccer may sadden us, the upside is that it’ll free everyone up to root for the Viking dude from Norway like we all secretly want to do anyways