Unpopular opinion:
In a serious relationship or marriage, checking your partner’s phone isn’t toxic, it’s basic trust insurance. Change my mind.
Let me explain why this take is getting so much heat right now.
When you’re fully committed, nothing on that phone should be hidden. Secret chats, hidden folders, deleted messages among others, aren’t “privacy,” they’re red flags.
If you have to hide something from the person you claim to love most, you’re already cheating or planning to. Full transparency kills temptation before it grows.
People scream “control” and “abuse” the second phones come up, but ask yourself: why are you so protective of that device?
If everything is clean, handing it over takes two seconds. Refusing to show it, getting angry when asked, or turning it into a fight, that’s the real control move.
It says, “I have something to protect that’s more important than your peace.”
First goal after returning from injury, dude literally lived out several Scriptures on global stage; “don’t look at me face, gaze on my Saviour instead!”
“He must increase, but I must decrease.”
John 3:30 KJV
“not that we are sufficient of ourselves to think any thing as of ourselves; but our sufficiency is of God;”
2 Corinthians 3:5 KJV
“I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.”
Galatians 2:20 KJV
Rest in peace, Patricia Routledge 🙏🏻
In memory of her, I encourage everyone to read these words of hers from February last year.
Whether young or old, you're bound to get something out of it.
*****
"I’ll be turning 95 this coming Monday. In my younger years, I was often filled with worry — worry that I wasn’t quite good enough, that no one would cast me again, that I wouldn’t live up to my mother’s hopes. But these days begin in peace, and end in gratitude.
My life didn’t quite take shape until my forties. I had worked steadily — on provincial stages, in radio plays, in West End productions — but I often felt adrift, as though I was searching for a home within myself that I hadn’t quite found.
At 50, I accepted a television role that many would later associate me with — Hyacinth Bucket, of Keeping Up Appearances. I thought it would be a small part in a little series. I never imagined that it would take me into people’s living rooms and hearts around the world. And truthfully, that role taught me to accept my own quirks. It healed something in me.
At 60, I began learning Italian — not for work, but so I could sing opera in its native language. I also learned how to live alone without feeling lonely. I read poetry aloud each evening, not to perfect my diction, but to quiet my soul.
At 70, I returned to the Shakespearean stage — something I once believed I had aged out of. But this time, I had nothing to prove. I stood on those boards with stillness, and audiences felt that. I was no longer performing. I was simply being.
At 80, I took up watercolour painting. I painted flowers from my garden, old hats from my youth, and faces I remembered from the London Underground. Each painting was a quiet memory made visible.
Now, at 95, I write letters by hand. I’m learning to bake rye bread. I still breathe deeply every morning. I still adore laughter — though I no longer try to make anyone laugh. I love the quiet more than ever.
I’m writing this to tell you something simple:
Growing older is not the closing act. It can be the most exquisite chapter — if you let yourself bloom again.
Let these years ahead be your TREASURE YEARS.
You don’t need to be famous. You don’t need to be flawless.
You only need to show up — fully — for the life that is still yours.
With love and gentleness,
Patricia Routledge
*****
Once more, rest in peace. 🤍