mustache himbo

bro my brain’s been deep fried since 9/11 | former roommate

[Sethy @Brizksie]

"Bear open up. It really is a billion dollars-" https://t.co/hd4rgJ2Mn4

[Andrew Woods @JimJarmuschHair]

My biggest takeaway from OBSESSION is that there’s no way that music shop needed all four of those employees

[carter hambley @carterhambley]

sad to hear. crab fishing has brought me and my wife closer than ever

[Casual MMA @CasualMMAinc]

Sean Brady might disappear after tonight

Dude got paid off by the mafia and didn’t take the dive #UFC328

[Mark @AgingRanchHand]

75 and sunny. Perfect day for sending emails

[Transfer Portal @NCAAPortal]

In my mind every work week is a best of 5 and I’m just trying to win the series

[mau @rllydu]

explain it to me like i’m 30

[Xaniken @Xaniken]

They should add proximity chat to traffic

[Willie @Willie600640663]

Every rubber duck on the dashboard of a jeep represents a confirmed kill

[kurahu@AIart @kurahu_capten]

Tap the screen

[Organizermemes @OrganizerMemes]

Balls still exist

[k• @luvrgrrrl777]

i ate my dads sandwich that he had in the fridge. this was the scariest text to receive after that

[Errai @errai]

Both my wife and my doctor said no more jumping on the bed. But they don't get it. They don't know what it's like to live with the Monkey Instinct

[ѕєиɪ @zalatwicc]

it wasn't just the hoes that were scared i was scared too

[Buddy @EdGeinFan2]

the worst part of a fender bender is having to get out of your car and meet a new person

[g @34rths]

I wish I can take my stress and double it And give it to a Bald person

[Scoob @Scoobydouchebag]

We are the sons of the Hamburger you couldn't Help

[Ian Hartitz @Ihartitz]

Fantasy football is pretty much based on injury luck UNLESS I win in which case it's more of a skill-based game