suh mur

[suh mur @summerhardy__]

my 5 year old cousin made a “youtube” video😭😭 he’s the cutest i love him sm

[amanda @jailedamanda]

No one is bragging, we are telling you that it can’t be done so you don’t get hurt. But go with god and try it I guess.

[Anna Katherine ☀️🦊✨️ @TheFoxMatriarch]

We don't live in fields and get shit all over our nipples

[.🍏 @kittydoIls]

When people said that their advisor messed up their schedules and that they have to take extra classes because of it like baby they have the curriculum for your major on the website and you could just make your own schedule from there 😭😭

[Organizermemes @OrganizerMemes]

We developed such effective vaccines and pasteurization that people now think preventable diseases are fake and basic precautions are tyranny.

[Alana 🍎 edtwt @mermaidqueen555]

there’s people who peaked in high school but there’s also people who never move on from their bad high school experience.

[Thag Simmons @d_h_sanders]

It effectively illustrates that you could not commit a mass shooting with technology from the 18th century

[Haylz 🐇 (certified angst professional) @Rabbot__HOOAH]

Maybe controversial take but people can call him rude and shit all they want for this comment but he's not wrong

[laine 🥍 @hitchups]

did you guys know people are removing their organ donor status because they genuinely truly believe doctors are, like, maliciously harvesting organs from people who would otherwise pull through and putting them on the black market?

[victoria ♀️ @fatfabfeminist]

“toned arms” is genuinely insane this kinda rhetoric is gonna kill people

[mon @ClTYOFMON]

Maybe this is controversial of me but if you see the scenes so clearly in your head but can’t get them into cohesive words that sound good, maybe you’re just not a writer lol

[LB @looksbizarre]

Maybe I'm too waspish but I think for the TJ Maxx cashier you can leave it at "No thanks."

[Ali B @wtflanksteak]

we have bakeries! every city has bakeries! i grew up in the suburbs and we had like 3-6 bakeries! we know what a rustic artisan loaf is! you can get it at the grocery store or a bakery! we know what you're talking about!!!!!!!!!!!!

[beau i'spose 🦜 @frenchfrydream_]

the older I grow the more I dont play abt children like they're literally new here have some respect

[Rae @ragefighthouse]

‘She was up until 3am on her phone’
‘I can’t get that phone away from him’
‘It’s all these things he’s seeing online’
‘She’s always on social media’

YOU ARE THE PARENT.

YOU. ARE. THE. PARENT.

[nazzo @nazzobetweeting]

it’s funny how every single day you get on this app and people say “america has no culture!!!” and then in the same breath these people say “do americans know that XYZ american thing isn’t a thing anywhere else?” DO YOU HEAR YOURSELVES

[spike's pet @ricksredmachete]

The craziest thing about men not understanding consent is they will post proof they are a rapist and think it actually cleared their name

[oontz oontz @knotBoots]

The burglar chose the wrong home everybody know he does not play about that girl

[Hannah Krieg @hannahkrieg]

And yet you're tweeting about the funfetti cake batter incident

[Snarcasm Queen @MoreOrLessAMess]

Modern parents suck so badly and are ruining their children because of it.

"Hey, baby, the nurse is just going to talk too you for a minute, to check that you're safe. If there's anything you want to ask without me there, now is a good time. I'll be right outside."

[𝑱𝒐𝒓𝒐 @JoroJrn]

i love this one. sometimes that code appears before the message arrives.