Like a bar tab.

Cloud enthusiast and self-proclaimed millionaire.

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I just ate 61 Totino's Pizza Rolls in case any of you thought you were attracted to me.

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https://t.co/jWCEiaSw2v

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@DiGiorno Covid, allergies.

(Just prepping for fall.)

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@jessemount yes

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.@GetSpectrum A little ironic how I try to log in our spectrum account because our internet is crazy slow compared to normal and we're trying to work from home, and after the 8th time of trying to log in, the only thing that loads is the top bar about how reliable you are...

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@Airbnb Is your server going to be online sometime soon? We’ve been trying to book and soon I’m either going to go to https://t.co/Q46w8BznIM or throw my laptop against the wall out of frustration at your site refusing to work properly.

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@mattingebretson You’ve probably inspired at least four storylines by now...

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@AmericanAir How exactly is it that our bags were scanned onto our flight but now no one knows where they are now??

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Sticky, broken tray tables, broken seats, WiFi that doesn’t work even when paid for, and now they lost our bags. @AmericanAir you never fail to disappoint and infuriate.

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@jameson_us Hey, I'm going to the Jameson Ball in Dallas on Monday and I need to RSVP for my plus 1, because she never got the email inviteI sent from my RSVP form. How do I go about doing that?

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Meet Nef.
#Reykjavik #Iceland #OperationGooglyEyes @ Reykjavík, Iceland https://t.co/agpvUegNoG

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Deckin out for #DiaDeLosMuertos @ José https://t.co/AkBic35T11

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People that smoke at the gas pump are one of the main reasons I think the human gene pool could use a little chlorine.

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On top of the wor(l)d. #Belize @ Belize City, Belize https://t.co/5usdILWK15

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Meet Toto. #OperationGooglyEyes #Belize @ Belize City, Belize https://t.co/rdKPFlMr2H

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Just another day at the office. https://t.co/PXveyvZtwP

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Sometimes you meet people. Sometimes you meet birds. https://t.co/ApQXqzzlhe

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Apparently if you want to buy lemons in Mexico you can just go f**k yourself.

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This is Lisa and Armando. After a short conversation of which I understand almost nothing and… https://t.co/iSLTHQBnQZ

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Relationship Status: A girl just walked into a parked car because she was so focused on avoiding me as we passed.

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Hey @midnight, have y'all ever done #VideoGameAnimals? Ex: Mortal Wombat, Grand Theft Otter, Call of Duty: Modern Warthog.... #PointsMe?