kierstin

Waiting for the day Martha Stewart finally challenges me to hand-to-hand combat.

[kierstin @tapewormhost]

I am a jar of Newman’s Own mild salsa and life is the suburban mom serving me at the annual PTA party

[Ienka @ankyhaidy]

if i was a horse and my rider went unconscious and fell off me i would drag them on the ground for sooooo many miles

[miles @milesdotgov]

As a child I was adopted by the animatronic gorilla at the rainforest cafe, who took me under his wing and taught me important jungle skills like how to beat my chest every seven minutes on the dot

[pinkie @onlygirlonpluto]

i am proud of u

[jill @littlefucky]

Pretending I’m an influencer that got sent a free toilet

[Pukicho @pukicho]

We used to be warriors. Now we’re all so fucking cute. Awwww so cute.

[yoshimi battles video game addiction @nise_yoshimi]

me suffering the mummy's curse: aaaaahhhhhh!

the pharaoh: see i knew you wouldn't like it

me: I thought it would be sexy or something!

the pharaoh: well it isn't

[turbomander @turbomander]

return to your sopping home my sweet little chudling.

[lamb @darkseavoyage]

Faster, ever faster, I am propelled through my own life

[yosuba @coolfunnnn]

PEQUEÑA CRIATURA DE FIBRA DE VIDRIO...............

[horse dentist @equine__dentist]

he geen

[audrey @phlegmme]

The green M&M is the sexy one so you’d think the other M&Ms would have signature traits like the silly one, the intelligent one, the maternal one etc. But they don’t

[PmAmTraveller @pmamtraveller]

a 19th-century Inuit artifact from the Bering Sea region, crafted from walrus ivory to depict a polar bear carrying its cub.

[breezeh @briscoepark]

photo of a dog hotel i took in 2021

[DAILY OBJECT @dailyobject_]

DAILY OBJECT 1287:

QUESTION MARK CANDLE

[kierstin @tapewormhost]

Amelia Earhart x Eleanor Roosevelt doomed yuri

[The Notorious J.O.V. @whotfisjovana]

He was just bornt