tayyyllll 🛸

[Francesca Fiorentini @franifio]

That’ll do pig

[Fallon @filthtofilth]

I’m just fucking with you my liege

[Just Bill @WilliamAder]

Maybe Mitch McConnell is secretly taping "The Masked Singer." We don't know.

[Goblin Moder @mischiefanimals]

in the days before cameras this would've become a legendary local cryptid. in the 21st century we're calling it Jimothy

[Democrats Deliver @DemzDeliver]

🚨 NEW: Zohran Mamdani to permanently fund NYC libraries and parks.

Libraries will no longer have to plead for funding each year.

[tayyyllll 🛸 @taylcuneoo]

grace rocky save stars btw

[one dozen rats at a keyboard @PanasonicDX4500]

The Book of Revelation really made all this sound like it was going to be more poetic and less stupid.

[art @_artsartsarts]

i can’t get over seeing a braid in space … the simplicity & humanity of it … i could cry … we started in caves and now we’re all the way up there
⋆ ☄︎.
·˚ * 🔭

[Michael Lange @MichaelLangeNYC]

One of the 13 New Yorkers interviewed by the NYT for Mayor Mamdani's first 100 Days:

[tayyyllll 🛸 @taylcuneoo]

its a beautiful spring day and i love the new york mets baby!!!!

[horse dentist @equine__dentist]

the ides of march

[clifford carmichael @former_gcup]

“Oil is $100 the barrel” what kind of 1600s ass measurement is that. That means nothing to me. Let me see the barrel

[tayyyllll 🛸 @taylcuneoo]

sal vulcano as the american representative on taskmaster WHEN

[tayyyllll 🛸 @taylcuneoo]

she shouldve let me pick what the fuck taylor

[Taylor Swift Museum @theswiftmuseum]

USA TODAY reports that Taylor Swift personally selected five songs to represent her songwriting career for consideration in the Songwriters Hall of Fame.

As part of the nomination process, all eligible songwriters must formally approve their candidacy and choose five works that best illustrate their artistry before ballots are sent to voters.

Swift’s chosen titles were:

“All Too Well (10 Minute Version)”
“Blank Space”
“Anti-Hero”
“Love Story”
“The Last Great American Dynasty”

[lindsay @myholyrevival]

unfortunately taylor swift can do whatever she wants and i will remain tuned in because she wrote fearless at 17 and rewired my brain forever

[tayyyllll 🛸 @taylcuneoo]

as a moron, one thing i love about trump is

[Giff Lasta @GiffLasta]

As a Christian, one thing I love about Trump is how shameless he is about saying "Love my enemies? No way man, I hate those guys!"

So cool how the honesty allows the conversation to actually happen, rather than a bunch of pious platitudes.

[Mike @hammerito]

good luck with the rapture guys, I'm Catholic and I WILL be looting Protestants' homes tonight

[dr. cucumber @cucumberPhD]

Affirmations for a woman in her mid-20s:
I'm a real freak bitch
My thong is not up my asshole
Hot dogs make me lose weight
UTIs do not affect me
It's okay that I'm white sometimes
I wasn't in a sorority
I'm probably infertile
My husband has a boat
Alcoholism is a man thing

[erika @yeeeerika]

we are the daughters of the monsters you could not mash

[carter hambley @carterhambley]

if the ribbon is pink, breast cancer aware. if the ribbon is blue, pig at state fair