Thomas Bestul

The majority of my tweets are about my family

[Thomas Bestul @tbest73]

2020 was wild because a coworker told me their psychic said I was going through a spiritual awakening, but it turned out I just had cancer

[Thomas Bestul @tbest73]

Since it’s Ash Wednesday again, I wanted to bring up this great advice I received from someone

[Thomas Bestul @tbest73]

Ash Wednesday coming up reminds me how last year someone told me I should give up my leg for Lent after doctors found a mass in it

[Thomas Bestul @tbest73]

There’s nothing better than starting your morning by opening Task Manager when you inevitably were too lazy to turn off your computer the night before

[Thomas Bestul @tbest73]

With three years of Zoom experience, you think we’d learn the most graceful way to sneeze on a video call

[Thomas Bestul @tbest73]

Growing up did everyone else’s parents make them wear collared shirts and long pants when flying on a plane?

[Thomas Bestul @tbest73]

@bossycilantro Also glad you didnt add ketchup

[Thomas Bestul @tbest73]

@bossycilantro Happy you pregamed lunch

[Thomas Bestul @tbest73]

More people should talk about the empty nester parents to bird feeder enthusiasts pipeline

[Thomas Bestul @tbest73]

After I wrote this, they called me to start the MRI. I should never underestimate the power of the 4 people who read my tweets.

[Thomas Bestul @tbest73]

For how much @SimonMedImaging charges and how much I was overcharged this past year, you think they would have the resources for me not to wait an hour for my scheduled MRI

[Thomas Bestul @tbest73]

For how much @SimonMedImaging charges and how much I was overcharged this past year, you think they would have the resources for me not to wait an hour for my scheduled MRI

[Thomas Bestul @tbest73]

The most unrealistic thing about The Office is that everyone works with just one screen

[Thomas Bestul @tbest73]

@GibbyVodka That was more 2020 me

[Thomas Bestul @tbest73]

Last year my whole personality was getting the Pfizer vaccine, so I’m taking recommendations on who to be this year.

[Thomas Bestul @tbest73]

Did everyone have a teacher during the recession that said to only invest in companies whose products you could find in your kitchen cupboards? I guess I failed them since I haven’t invested in Morton’s Salt, Clorox, and Goya products.

[Thomas Bestul @tbest73]

Asking for a friend. Not because I’ve failed twice.

[Thomas Bestul @tbest73]

Has anyone successfully grown a chia pet?

[Thomas Bestul @tbest73]

My biggest Catholic power move is getting up early once a year to make sure I get my ashes on Ash Wednesday before other Catholics

[Jacob Kaplan @JacobKaplan17]

Spanish textbooks gave me unrealistic expectations about the frequency with which I’d be visiting cybercafes

[Thomas Bestul @tbest73]

It’s me I’m people

[Thomas Bestul @tbest73]

People only say “I’m living my best life” when they in fact are not living their best life

[Thomas Bestul @tbest73]

Nothing was more humbling as an 11 year old than Wii Fit