Emma Atkins

Nobody can be uncheered with a balloon. -Winnie the Pooh

[Emma Atkins @temmassee]

{first date}
Luke: what's your favorite movie?
Girl: Karate Kid
Luke: you don't say...

[and @spero1ucem]

girl I was seeing told me she’s just looking for fun. whats more fun than falling in love

[sulky . . @sulky80715248]

I'm free right now if you want to care about me

[martin short 4ever @martinhayter_]

our favorite emmy loser 😂✨

[Norm Macdonald @normmacdonald]

At times, the joy that life attacks me with is unbearable and leads to gasping hysterical laughter. I find myself completely out of control and wonder how could life could surprise me again and again and again, so completely. How could a man be a cynic? It is a sin.

[White Trash Nationalist @timpoolsbeani3]

I love lying to YouTube surveys. No I have never heard of Amazon or Walmart.

[صفا @user260600]

i rather my man commit fraud than post aesthetic photos dump saying goodbye to august

[Meggy @igetsoinspired]

Putting all my eggs in one basket bc I only like this one basket

[𝓞 𝓻 𝓪 𝓷 𝓰 𝓮 @its0range]

poco se habla de la gente que te esperaba mientras tú metías todo en la mochila.

[sophia @pastoralcomical]

idk about “the ick” per se but i do think it reflects poorly on a man if the wind turns his umbrella inside out

[Olise @Olisehateshittt]

stop bothering me or l will inform you of a behavioral pattern that is noticeable to other people but I can tell you are not yet aware of

[bailey ☆ ★ @couldawentpro]

at the club asking where the recycling bin is

[James | PlagueTV @PlagueTV]

I was just thinking that airports would be 10x better if we added a bunch of people that dont need to be there.

[Mr. Gingles @GinglesMr]

Me with the little gnome I found frolicking in the woods

[Kat @ollkorrect0]

"It's all in your head" yes but unfortunately that's where I am too

[Ashley Willis (McNamara) @ashleymcnamara]

If this Elizabeth Holmes doc is the first time you’re hearing about Nathan Fielder, you are NOT ready to just jump right in. You need to prep. You need to train. You need to build up your secondhand embarrassment tolerance first. Nathan Fielder is advanced-level discomfort.

[Tyth @Tyth3sly]

Told someone have a nice day and they told me to have a nice week. I didnt even know you could do that. Am I a bad person.

[rio 🪲bug oomf @colligocritters]

I wish bugs had little phones so they could call me when they get stuck on their back

[blehh @pupzypup]

bird 1: are we safe?
bird 2: yeah he only has one stone

[Ashtyn Butuso @lil_buts]

Society yearns for a weekly HBO show we can all rally around