Chris Schalk

[chomper94 @chomper1994]

Today is the only day you can retweet this.

[Chris Schalk @the_schalk]

Tim Walz owns corn dog socks. Socks with corn dogs on them. Tim Walz. Corn dog socks.

[Chris Schalk @the_schalk]

I have not heard all the national anthems of the world. The Dutch national anthem may be the worst. The only redeeming quality is that it is very short.

[Chris Schalk @the_schalk]

Hula hooping should be an Olympic Sport.

[Chris Schalk @the_schalk]

I take back anything bad I ever said about Phish.

[Chris Schalk @the_schalk]

The sun has been setting on Fish's drums for the past hour. They are going to sound warm tonight. @phishmondegreen

[Chris Schalk @the_schalk]

@phishmondegreen

Security line at 1:00.

[Chris Schalk @the_schalk]

The color commentator doing the Crew game is one of the best. I don't even know her name. #MLSSeasonPass

[Chris Schalk @the_schalk]

@staidindoors He's a little too glib about humanity's existence for me. Seems like the kind of robot that would nuke the planet to see what happens.

[Chris Schalk @the_schalk]

Team fucking Daemon. #HouseOfTheDragons2ep8

[Chris Schalk @the_schalk]

@neorsd @clevelanddotcom @NEORSDbeaches That Schalk kid is a f'n badass.

[Chris Schalk @the_schalk]

@gdavies this shitty painting, hanging in this shitty bar, in beautiful Cleveland, Ohio looks just like you sans the mustachio.

[Chris Schalk @the_schalk]

I've been a shadow of myself since the summer of 22 when they discontinued this. Thank the Gods it's coming back. #nobettertacothanachocotaco

https://t.co/AISt15egw0

[Chris Schalk @the_schalk]

Good pho is good pho. #phoandbeyond #phosnob

[Chris Schalk @the_schalk]

The Crusades were jacked up. #DrRoyCasagranda #tortureandcannibalism
#onthewaytoJerusalem

[Chris Schalk @the_schalk]

"The Bachelor is a toxic show." @dropout #bestgameshows

[Chris Schalk @the_schalk]

Do you ever think of a new handshake and get super juiced to try it out with someone? #kungfustance

[Chris Schalk @the_schalk]

Just normalizing the use of the term "mamma jamma" over here. #mammajamma

[Chris Schalk @the_schalk]

@katjamb Based on a book. #queenbeesandwannabees

[Chris Schalk @the_schalk]

All these people drinking too much caffeine are harshing my vibe. Y'all gotta know how to handle your drugs. #chill