Lynzee

On a quest to make the perfect macaron

[Lynzee @theassholewitch]

Wild that the only thing our government seems to be able to agree on is that this atrocity is okay

[Lynzee @theassholewitch]

Some companies: We are gonna count the drawers and if it is even $1 off you will get in trouble.
Me at my job the morning after my closing shift: Yo the drawer was off by 3k last night.
The Owner: Wild. I'm sure it's fine.

[Lynzee @theassholewitch]

Turned my ac on for the first time this summer not because I was hot but because I had the overwhelming desire to sit in the cold for a little bit. Needed to feel like a penguin in Antarctica for some enrichment time

[Lynzee @theassholewitch]

Also I %100 support a strike, I'll take the inconvenience if it means they get treated better. I just need to know so I can plan my breakdowns accordingly

[Lynzee @theassholewitch]

Waiting to see if ups strikes and waiting to see if some managers decide to quit so I can figure out how much crying at work I'm gonna do this season

[Lynzee @theassholewitch]

I'm delusional in the sense that I think I could by a small piece of land and build a small home on it myself and everything would work out fine

[Lynzee @theassholewitch]

@ackwrites Good luck!!

[Lynzee @theassholewitch]

I'm like a zoo animal pacing my enclosure just waiting for some stupid tourist to hop the fence

[Lynzee @theassholewitch]

I'm beginning to really understand "if animals don't have enough stimulation they destroy things". I've been so bored at work lately that I have thought about pushing all the do not push buttons, breaking glasses, and pushing stuff off of shelves just to have something to do

[Lynzee @theassholewitch]

True restraint is having a cart full of cute on sale clothes and then not clicking to checkout

[Lynzee @theassholewitch]

Anyone else just get so extremely bored with life that they just wanna move away and start over

[Lynzee @theassholewitch]

@haleythebirdie I am so down! I just need to feel cute around other people lol

[Lynzee @theassholewitch]

The sad part of living where I live is that there really isn't any place in town where I can get ridiculously dressed up and go to. I just wanna go all out on myself and sit at a fancy restaurant outside my tax bracket

[Lynzee @theassholewitch]

Working in an ice cream shop but forgetting to bring home ice cream for the dessert I made is my canon event

[Tyus D. Williams @sciencewithtyus]

WTF, do you mean “scientists failed to communicate?” We’ve been screaming at the top of our damn lungs for decades!

[Lynzee @theassholewitch]

I gave her a shot and now she's just glaring at me

[Lynzee @theassholewitch]

The biggest injustice rn is that I'm finally making decent money but it's taken me so long at the same job to get here that I'm no longer actively interested in this job and I'm kinda just existing here until I'm in a place where I can leave

[Lynzee @theassholewitch]

Tried to help my coworkers daughter figure out the last riddle for a $10k scavenger hunt and the adrenaline rush of researching, making connections, finding the play on words, trying to decipher the clues all while knowing that 100 ppl are racing against you is great

[Lynzee @theassholewitch]

Love that I casually tell my mom I'm thinking about a tattoo and she just starts sending me ideas. We've come so far

[Lynzee @theassholewitch]

Going out to a nice restaurant by yourself is such a power move