dylan bender

I wonder how many people have a picture of me riding a roller coaster with them in their house

[Softboy @softboywin]

starting the second half of your sandwich is like hell yeah baby let’s run it back

[dylan bender @thefrumpy1]

@DefiantLs @KamalaHarris Crazy this tweet almost got more likes that the post haha

[dylan bender @thefrumpy1]

@Ty_Dyy @McDonalds

[dylan bender @thefrumpy1]

I was like last Bender to procreate, Only 5 years behind the first! 🥳
🌠 miss Ellie Blair 🌠

[dylan bender @thefrumpy1]

Trying to come up with a middle name for our child... what do you think? Help us decide!

[Seth Waz @sethwaz7]

The CDC also says you can untuck your jeans from your boots at the county fair

[Douglas A. Boneparth @dougboneparth]

“Dad, why are all the numbers on your screen red?” Go to your room.

[cory @coolmathgame_]

[bartending]

him: can i get a piña colada

me: yeah

him: can u make it virgin

me: *starting to cry* yes i know how to make it

[boy you a fool @sceneboyvarceee]

bro said shrek got more bitches more than me like im supposed to feel bad nigga shrek was a home owner with acres on his property that bested a dragon in battle he bound to have a hoe or two

[Emma Manzini @EmmaManzini]

A shark could swim faster than me, but I could probably run faster than a shark. So in a triathlon, it would all come down to who is the better cyclist.

[maia 🥰. @stuckonmaia]

“Yo password weak” well so is my memory so plz let me keep it

[dylan bender @thefrumpy1]

@bfitz2015 Look at you posting the type of things you get mad at females for posting

[todd bonzalez @doinkpatrol]

do u think that burger king and dairy queen fuck sometimes

[Rachel @femaleredhead]

i am an old man and twitter is my porch

[HanSue Gloger @hansuewilson]

Quarantine is basically just those summers in middle school when your parents had work and you couldn’t drive yet

[dylan bender @thefrumpy1]

How are yall upset at the president when most of yalls parents are racist as fuck 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[g 7\ @Excaliburoxide]

*corona virus enters my body*

The 4 Flintstone gummies I ate in 2005:

[dylan bender @thefrumpy1]

Half of you girls with premiums don't even have nudes worth sharing. Let alone cash out on em🤣🤣