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Your first meme was probably a Chuck Norris fact. Mine was. He died yesterday in Hawaii at 86, ten days after posting a video of himself throwing punches on his birthday. His caption: “I don’t age. I level up.” This is a little tribute.
The real Chuck Norris was wilder than any meme about him. He lost his first three karate tournaments, then went 65-5 over the next decade. Six-time undefeated world middleweight karate champion. Black belts in five different disciplines. First person ever inducted into the Black Belt Hall of Fame, and the only martial artist to be named to it three separate times.
His student Steve McQueen told him to try acting. That led to a fight scene opposite Bruce Lee in Way of the Dragon (1972), which became the highest-grossing film in Hong Kong that year. Then Walker, Texas Ranger ran 9 seasons on CBS, 194 episodes, broadcast in over 100 countries.
But his biggest cultural moment started with a college freshman’s joke. In 2005, a Brown University student named Ian Spector built a random fact generator on the Something Awful forums. It was originally about Vin Diesel. When the novelty faded, Spector ran a poll with 12 celebrity options. Chuck Norris wasn’t on the list. He won anyway, by write-in landslide.
By early 2006, the Chuck Norris Fact Generator was pulling 20 million pageviews a month. This was before Twitter existed, before Facebook was public, before YouTube had a single viral hit. A college kid’s joke website about a semi-retired action star became one of the most visited humor pages on the internet. It spawned six books (some hit the New York Times bestseller list), two video games, and a scene in The Expendables 2 where Sylvester Stallone’s character recites a Chuck Norris fact to Chuck Norris’s face.
When asked about his favorite fact, Norris said it was: “They tried to carve Chuck Norris’ face into Mount Rushmore, but the granite wasn’t hard enough for his beard.”
The meme ran for 21 years. Most memes last weeks. Chuck Norris Facts introduced more people to Chuck Norris than his movies ever did. For everyone born after 1995, he was never an aging action star or a karate champion. He was the guy who counted to infinity. Twice. The guy whose tears cure cancer, too bad he never cried.
The last thing the internet saw from Chuck Norris was him throwing punches on his 86th birthday. Which is, honestly, the most Chuck Norris fact of all.
Anyone outside of government with a strong opinion on the Iran strikes right now likely does not have a serious opinion.
To ascertain the justice and prudence of the strikes, one requires information that most of us simply don't have:
1.) How imminent really was the threat of Iran's nuclear program?
2.) What is the likelihood that we can efficiently and effectively implement a new, friendly regime?
The skeptics who make comparisons to Iraq have good reason: this is a preemptive attack over weapons of mass destruction and the liberation of an oppressed people in a nation bordering Iraq which is so similar that the countries share 75% of the letters in their names.
The hawks who dismiss fears of another quagmire observe that President Trump has the best foreign policy record of any president in decades, perhaps in our lifetimes, and therefore has earned credibility and trust on these issues.
If this intervention fails like Iraq, Trump's legacy could be destroyed like Bush's. If it succeeds, Trump can claim the greatest geopolitical victory since the fall of the Berlin Wall.
No one can know with certainty what the outcome will be. But likewise, no one can know whether or not the strike was wise until we know the answers to those two questions.
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