Theo. Just Theo

Some bags have to douche,
some douches have to bag

[Theo. Just Theo @theo_unco]

I don't like Kombucha because it tastes like pacifism

[Theo. Just Theo @theo_unco]

Sweet texts from Mom 💛❤💛

[Philosophy Muse @philosophy_muse]

A man's maturity is to have rediscovered the seriousness he possessed as a child at play. Nietzsche

[Theo. Just Theo @theo_unco]

Saturday's plans of badassery have been cancelled and im fucking heart broke

[m@thew @TweetPotato314]

me: how many are in a dozen

baker: 13

me: why

baker: cause fuck 12

[Theo. Just Theo @theo_unco]

I really wanted to get into Spaceforce but then they shit on Colorado so now I'm over it

[Theo. Just Theo @theo_unco]

I accidentally just snorted a bunch of Creole seasoning and now I can't stop speaking in broken english with a french accent

[Theo. Just Theo @theo_unco]

@kaitlyn_chain

[Theo. Just Theo @theo_unco]

@kaitlyn_chain I'm 24, just saying

[Theo. Just Theo @theo_unco]

I Just now found out Justin Gaethje attended @UNC_Colorado !
#Skobears #UFC

[Theo. Just Theo @theo_unco]

@Anndyyyyyyyyyyy Thats the perfect roommate right there 😂

[Theo. Just Theo @theo_unco]

I said "I'm throwing caution to the wind" and threw a roll of caution tape out the window...my supervisor apparently didn't think that was funny

[Theo. Just Theo @theo_unco]

Yo how the Fuck do people manage to drink tomato juice without tons of vodka in it??

[samira @nastysamira]

now this is exactly why i believe in god. damnnn. https://t.co/1piCyfMKzN

[Theo. Just Theo @theo_unco]

Shaving everything but my moustache is gonna be the same energy as girls dyeing their hair pink and purple during the quarantine. Thoughts?

[Theo. Just Theo @theo_unco]

I yeeted a wasp with a traffic cone and now his cousins will not leave me alone

[Theo. Just Theo @theo_unco]

I feel like I got peer pressured into getting food with my margarita

[Theo. Just Theo @theo_unco]

Remember kids:

[Theo. Just Theo @theo_unco]

Not gonna lie...i was today years old when i found out Hemingway killed himself