Will Phillips

Jurassic Park enthusiast. I’ve deleted SOME past tweets, but I’m also not running for office.

[Will Phillips @TheThryll]

What time does mass start at the RoboCop statue?

[Will Phillips @TheThryll]

I would argue that hating the Super Bowl halftime performer is the one of the most time honored American traditions of all

[Will Phillips @TheThryll]

What this country needs now more than ever is a smartphone with a new kind of charging cable

[Will Phillips @TheThryll]

So @jeffdunham has this off-brand YouTube video where he unboxes an old 1957 television, and it’s the greatest thing I’ve ever seen. Please drown your puppets and do more unboxing videos

[Will Phillips @TheThryll]

[Stupid idiot Windows feature]

“Are you ready to finish setting up this computer you’ve been using for the past 5 years?!?!?!”

[Will Phillips @TheThryll]

(Everyone) Mmm, I love the secret sauce here

(Restaurant) It’s literally just every condiment mixed together, some meth head who worked 3 shifts came up with it

[Will Phillips @TheThryll]

My favorite thing to do in Airbnbs is to screw up their YouTube algorithm

“Best wineries in the Finger Lakes”

“Top restaurants in the Hamptons”

“Terry Funk vs Dusty Rhodes in a Texas bull rope match”

[Will Phillips @TheThryll]

Password fatigue is intense. Take my fingerprint, scan my eyeball, scrape the inside of my cheek, just please solve this

[Will Phillips @TheThryll]

The movie “Paul” (2011) found its way into way more casual party trivia games than it really deserves.

[Will Phillips @TheThryll]

It’s never been a more exciting time to never have had a 401K!!!

[Will Phillips @TheThryll]

Hate that I’m only getting into eggs now

[Will Phillips @TheThryll]

I feel like nobody has missed Dustin Hoffman in movies…?

[Will Phillips @TheThryll]

I remember a time when there was nobody named Grayson

[Will Phillips @TheThryll]

Wild how after all these years steel still tries to impress by calling itself “stainless”

[Will Phillips @TheThryll]

Unsuccessful coupon codes should at least tell you if you’re close

[Will Phillips @TheThryll]

The fact that Swedes aren’t offended by The Swedish Chef is more offensive than the actual Swedish Chef. Maybe we should cancel Sweden (but keep the Swedish Chef)

[Will Phillips @TheThryll]

Are you still a porch pirate if you just take the box and leave the item? I need a specific size to ship something, and it’s right across the street

[Will Phillips @TheThryll]

Just went full-on 2 Girls 1 Cup on a jar of Nutella

[Will Phillips @TheThryll]

Oh, you claim to be a Tiny Tim fan? Name a song OTHER than Tiptoe Through the Tulips

[Will Phillips @TheThryll]

That debate was the worst takedown of a WWE Hall of Famer since Randy Orton gave Hulk Hogan an RKO on a car