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[Jon Heyman @JonHeyman]

@___BOEHMER___ Yesterday I was accused of being a Yankee cuck whatever that means

[Stinson Dean 🌲🪓 @LumberTrading]

Should I go up to this Lamborghini owner and say, "nice Corvette."

[Jed I. Goodman © @jedigoodman]

The Last Time is Now.

The nightmare is finally over.

[Zhang Yong 张勇 @zhangyong02]

Work tomorrow

I will commit suicide and blame workplace institution for despair

[Jack Slack @JackSlackMMA]

Heard we’re getting a Christmas miracle?

[🇨🇦 @thirtythree35]

@Accomplishedmum Can't fail if you forgot to start lol

[🇨🇦 @thirtythree35]

@LittleRed153411 Every night

[CTV News Vancouver Island @CTVNewsVI]

9-year-old was working B.C. carnival ride when drunk patron fell out, breaking bones: regulator https://t.co/7gihLwxppu

[TMZ @TMZ]

Former Buccaneers Running Back Doug Martin Dead at 36 https://t.co/5HIgOZEIni

[dom canzone acolyte @rogerszmodys]

THE MIGHTY UNSTOPPABLE POWER OF THE CALIPHATE INCREASES BY THE MINUTE

[🇨🇦 @thirtythree35]

still got it

[Acyn @Acyn]

Trump: He did not hate his opponents. He wanted the best for them. That's where I disagreed with Charlie. I hate my opponent and I don't want the best for them. I'm sorry

[Seattle Mariners @Mariners]

THAT. JUST. HAPPENED.

[Daniel Kramer @DKramer_]

Full trade, sources tell MLB•com...

• Mariners receive: 3B Eugenio Suárez

• D-backs receive: 1B Tyler Locklear (Mariners’ No. 9 prospect by @MLBPipeline), RHP Hunter Cranton (No. 16), RHP Juan Burgos (No. 17)

[Max0r 🔜 OFFKAI @realMax0r]

was doing the self checkout at costco when a Chinese grandma with her hands behind her back walked over and carefully inspected my cart like she was evaluating the feng shui. with one single nod, she expressed approval, and disappeared into the hot dog line

[jo34200 @jo34200]

Went to my local Toyota dealership for a airbag swap on my Car, saw this sign in the back of the garage, asked if it was for sale ! Sadly no..
Back to pickup the car, the mechanic was here with the sign and give it to me as a gift because my request was funny and uncommon ! 🥹

[Jeff Passan @JeffPassan]

Nick Kurtz just had one of the greatest games in baseball history.

6 for 6 with four home runs, six runs and eight RBIs.

He is a 22-year-old rookie.

[Le'Veon Bell @LeVeonBell]

if you’re a guy and you’re having a bad day just remember no one really cares ..