timix000

These posts are exclusively to promote the Timix000 music label

[timix000 @timix000]

https://t.co/kTSNV9jUUH

[timix000 @timix000]

Google should have an AI OverGru where Steve Carell poorly summarizes the top search results instead

[timix000 @timix000]

I'm gonna become a pathological liar that lies about mundane shit like "I had to replace my tires today" or "I texted my mom a recipe"

[timix000 @timix000]

What if it was called Swallow Knight: Dicksong?

[timix000 @timix000]

Fam, this shit slaps. Yeet!
On jah? No cap, you fr?
Deadass bruh; Big Mood.

[timix000 @timix000]

I'm a citizen of the world. I'm a brother to all walks of life. Except the ones that suck shit and piss me off.

[timix000 @timix000]

I be calling my grandma regularly LIKE A BOSS

[timix000 @timix000]

Me confronting my dumb shit son about his failing physics grade: "I don't think you understand the gravity of the situation."

My Son using his neurolink to turn into photorealistic Bart Simpson that's just a little wrong: "Don't have a chow man"

[timix000 @timix000]

I be snorting paint fuckin smoking on some lead gas eating asbestos with the oatmeal shit bitch

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Stranger (not eaten): "What's your favorite ice cream flavor"
Me (not a cannibal): Not human flesh. That's for sure.

[timix000 @timix000]

Said "oh boy" in Europe and now my ass is on a list

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Woke Paplatine be like: No... No... YOU are cancelled!

[timix000 @timix000]

If you make more money than me you're a cop (I'm unemployed)

[timix000 @timix000]

Me reviewing my favorite movie of all time: It's well shot and the acting is good.
Me reviewing 2013 YA slop made by pedophiles based on racist fanfiction:
At minute 56 when Sharry Glotter turns CGI Genghis Khan white, the lighting juxtaposes the heterodox camerawork while the...

[timix000 @timix000]

Tired of all the "children are the future" bullshit. Children are the NOW! Put a four year old in the white house immediately!

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Bill Skarsgard after getting a little too method: oh godh. I realy keeled zose cheeldren

[timix000 @timix000]

I had a dream that I'm old and my Shrek DVD got scratched so I got a replacement at Goodwill, and then when I tried to watch it with my two teenage sons the movie kept cutting to a strange low budget cult film and my younger son says "Dad I don't think this is Shrek"

[timix000 @timix000]

While you eat BURGER from FASCIST COMPANY I be chowing down scrumptious delicacies of my own creation

[timix000 @timix000]

Money so long had to insert disc two

[timix000 @timix000]

I had a dream that Weird Al made a Chappell Roan parody that went

She's not H-O-T-T-O-G-O,
She's just watching Bong Joon-ho,
Parasite and Snowpiercer,
You want sex? Don't talk to her

And then I had the in dream thought "Weird Al would NOT say 'sex' " and woke up immediately