Victoria P

im trying to figure myself, and this whole world out at the same time.

[Victoria P @torioverrated]

Planning my sisters bridal shower means that I now get approx 1 billion wedding ads…..

[SwiftieLee 🖤 @SwiftieLee1]

Leaving a toxic workplace has a weird feeling, like you're relieved you've finally left. But also annoyed that a perfectly good job has been unnecessary ruined by a few people creating a horrible horrible work culture

[Victoria P @torioverrated]

This morning I put on a new pair of jeans & walk out of the bathroom
Conner “whoa”
Me “they fit nicely right”
Conner “you look really tall”
Me “Tall? No one has ever used that word to describe me before”
Conner “yeah, you just look really tall today.”
😭😅🪦💀

[Victoria P @torioverrated]

Marshy (dog) farts
Conner : dude you & your farts are a natural disaster
😂😂😂😂😂😂

[Victoria P @torioverrated]

One of my guiltiest pleasures in life is the birthday cake pop at star bucks

[Victoria P @torioverrated]

You know how they have automatic starters for cars? I want that for my heated blanket so it’s already warm when I get home.

[🔥 SpicyMeetups 🌶️🔥 @spicymeetups]

cleaning out your camera roll is like the biggest chore ever.

[Victoria P @torioverrated]

Trying to beat @krpollard at the NYT daily games is impossible

[yeli @135YELI]

Felt the sun and immediately felt great, I’m literally a flower

[RI-RI @thegirllriri]

sometimes i can't believe i'm a grown up

[Tony P. @Tbone7219]

I showered and put on clothes just to lay back on the couch.

[𝕁𝕠𝕙𝕟 🎩 @Jumperjohn1976]

Twitter is basically a socially acceptable way to talk to yourself without being committed to a mental institution.

[Cannie Oakley: Local Cryptid @Staceballs]

Unfortunately, I have the paper towel habit of a much wealthier woman

[Victoria P @torioverrated]

My sisters & (future) brother-in-laws wedding is going to be iconic in every way possiblE

[Victoria P @torioverrated]

🤣 every year, same conversation

[Victoria P @torioverrated]

“Didn’t you grow up ina house with no heat?”-Boyfriend
“Yeah?”- me
“Then WHY do you keep our house at 60° all the time?”- boyfriend
“Idk, because we can wear layers?”- me

[Victoria P @torioverrated]

A convo with a resident: *shows a picture of the dogs*

Me: The five year old is the bossiest one

Resident: Sounds like you’re raising a a future CEO. What’s her name? *forgets I’m talking about dogs*

Me: Pepperoni

Resident: my GOD why would you name your child that?