Jack Trimber

super ultra professional stand up comic | DC based | sad wizards fan |

[N4V4RR0! @Zer0reflect]

this the shit they showed in disclosure day and cut to people crying

[❥ 𝑪𝒐𝒇𝒇𝒆𝒆 𝑳𝒐𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒔 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑭𝒂𝒏𝒔 ❥ @tonyhawktruther]

*rubs my big Amelia Earhart-shaped belly and burps*

[john teufel @JohnTeufelNYC]

SHE'S 32 YOU SICK F*CK

[Jack Trimber @trimbercomedy]

Nooooooooo

[Shams Charania @ShamsCharania]

Free agent center Marvin Bagley III has agreed to a one-year deal with the Denver Nuggets, sources tell ESPN. A critical frontcourt addition for the Nuggets.

[Jack Trimber @trimbercomedy]

Maybe we can trade AD for Luka at this point

[Shams Charania @ShamsCharania]

Free agent sharpshooter Luke Kennard has agreed to a two-year, $13 million deal with the Phoenix Suns, with a player option for the second season, sources tell ESPN.

[Flat Ranger - UT @UtahFlatRanger]

"You're hiding a unregistered AC Unit, are you not?"

[SleeperWizards @SleeperWizards]

28 years old 27 years old
$185m/4yr $212m/4yr
0x All-NBA 1x All-NBA
0x All-Star 4x All-Star

“Lakers up” “Lol Wizards”
“Amazing deal” “Horrible deal”
“Young star” “Old washed”

[Jack Trimber @trimbercomedy]

All this just to stop Will Riley

[ESPN @espn]

Breaking: The Milwaukee Bucks are trading Giannis Antetokounmpo and Bobby Portis to the Miami Heat for Tyler Herro, Kel'el Ware, Jaime Jaquez Jr., Kasparas Jakucionis, 3 first-round picks (including No. 13), 1 pick swap and 1 second-rounder, sources tell @ShamsCharania.

[Derek Heckman @herekdeckman]

“And it appears that…yes…he and his friends are…killing the alien with hammers”

[cameron! @workreps]

#pouroutabeeronyourcrotchchallenge

[Jack Trimber @trimbercomedy]

Boozer is not a NBA star player plz stop all this. He’s going to be an Aaron Gordon type player, when you have the number 1 pick you don’t pick less athletic Aaron Gordon.

[wonzo🧀 @WonzoTV]

versatile shot blocking 5 next to a floor spacing board man 4 is an incredible fit

if only the Wiz- nvm

[Jack Trimber @trimbercomedy]

New York fans are a bunch of losers

[Oliya Scootercaster 🛴 @ScooterCasterNY]

WATCH: School Bus driver attempts to defend his bus from unruly crowd

"It's coming out of my paycheck!" Driver Screams As Crows DESTROY School Bus Smashing it in TSQ after Knicks WIN

[shoob. @shoooobb]

2016-17 wiz

[DT @15DT15]

Incorrect.

If Victor Wembanyama teams up with Cooper Flagg and Cade Cunningham at age 27, promises 8 NBA Championships then gets outplayed in a finals by Davion Mitchell and loses.

He will no longer be eligible to ever be considered better than Michael Jordan.

[Josh RR Jokien @joshcarlosjosh]

The hobbits cheering for Gandalf after he sets off another round of fireworks:

[Barry @BarryOnHere]

If OKC loses tonight, this will be Lu Dort to Wemby's knee at the start of Game 2

[Jack Trimber @trimbercomedy]

Gee it’s almost like… that’s where our front office came from….

[SleeperJazz @SleeperJazz]

Franchise gets lucky with the 1st pick and suddenly their front office is the reincarnation of Sam Presti and OKC. 😭

[Jack Trimber @trimbercomedy]

We need to bring back insane asylums

[NetsPress @NetsPressIG]

Hypothetical Mock Trade Idea:

Nets Receive: 1st pick

Thunder Receive: 2029 1st via HOU/DAL/PHX (via BKN)

Wizards Receive: 6th & 17th picks plus 2028 unprotected Nets 1st, 2029 unprotected Knicks 1st and 2032 unprotected Nuggets 1st.

Who says no? #NetsWorld

[Jack Trimber @trimbercomedy]

His basketball IQ is so off the charts, he watched so much film. Ya’ll better listen to the man

[wizkidsforever @wizkidsforever]

John Wall told @kevinsheehanDC if he was to pick #1 for the Wizards he would select Darryn Peterson