Linda Page @twilightzone81 - Twitter Profile

I want to recap what actually happened at M&S, because some people seem determined to turn this into something it was not. I went early evening because I thought the shop would be quieter. I was shopping with my teenage daughter, who is autistic and has sensory issues around clothing. Anyone who parents a child with sensory difficulties will understand how hard clothes shopping can be. Fabric, fit, seams, tightness, waistbands, labels, texture, all of it matters. Something can look perfectly fine on the hanger and be completely unbearable once worn. Ordering several sizes online and returning them is neither logistically nor economically feasible for us, and in any case my daughter likes to touch and see things before deciding whether she is comfortable with them. That approach simply doesn’t work for her. So, for the avoidance of doubt, nothing would have suited me better than for my daughter to be able to try the clothes on and ensure she has enough things to see her through Summer. That was the whole point of going to the changing rooms. I was not looking for confrontation. I was not trying to make a political point. I was trying to make an ordinary shopping trip work for an autistic teenage girl who finds clothes difficult. I walked into the changing area calmly and practically. My intention was to find a suitable cubicle, ideally the larger disabled one, check that it felt safe and manageable, and then encourage my daughter to follow me in. That was the plan. Had she been able to try the clothes on, it would have saved time, stress, uncertainty, returns, and the familiar nightmare of buying something that later turns out to be impossible for her to wear. So the idea that I somehow wanted there to be a problem is absurd. The changing room was supposed to be the solution. The problem arose when my daughter became distressed by the presence of a male member of staff supervising the changing area. I had not anticipated her reaction. It was not scripted by me. I did not wind her up. I did not march in looking for a row. She reacted. I saw her distress. I took it seriously. And yes, I think a teenage girl, particularly an autistic teenage girl, is entitled to feel safe and comfortable in a changing-room environment. This is not complicated. It is not about hating anyone. It is not about being difficult. It is not about “vibes” or emotional projection or whatever patronising theory people wish to attach to it online. It is about a vulnerable young woman trying to buy clothes, and finding that the space provided did not feel safe or appropriate to her. Parents of autistic children spend a lot of time trying to prepare, adapt, reassure, smooth things over, and make ordinary life manageable. Sometimes it works. Sometimes it doesn’t. On this occasion, it didn’t. But I will not apologise for taking my daughter’s distress seriously. Or believing that M&S should change their policy.

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