Uncle Pongo

To my employer reading this: QUICK, LOOK BEHIND YOU!

[Uncle Pongo @unclepongo]

Played my band's final shows this weekend. Still processing it, but in the meantime here's some photos where I actually don't hate how I look.

[Uncle Pongo @unclepongo]

I also want an apology from Brian Cashman if we trade for Aroldis Chapman.

[Talkin' Yanks @TalkinYanks]

Aroldis Chapman wants an apology from Brian Cashman if he were to be traded back to the Yankees, per @Enrique_Rojas1

[Uncle Pongo @unclepongo]

@ali_sivi She was very clear: Ready or not, here she comes.

[Uncle Pongo @unclepongo]

Okay good so I wasn't the only one holding my phone to my ear to make it out.

[Carey O'Donnell @ecareyo]

A movie that asks — just what in the Hell is Mikey Madison saying in the first ten seconds of this trailer?

[Uncle Pongo @unclepongo]

I feel like people should pay me to complement them. I'm too good at it to do it for free anymore. Venmo me $5 to get gassed tf up.

[Uncle Pongo @unclepongo]

Me after exchanging 2 DMs: what are we

[Uncle Pongo @unclepongo]

Who's a guy gotta fuck raw to get some skin on skin contact around here send tweet

[Uncle Pongo @unclepongo]

My high school theater teacher told me in front of the entire play that if I didn't say my lines louder and slower, he would give them to someone else. You know what I did? I said them louder and slower.

Anyway, Anthony Volpe just struck out again.

[Uncle Pongo @unclepongo]

@penandjen She just like me fr

[Uncle Pongo @unclepongo]

My DMs are open to any women in turmoil after the Knicks loss. I'm falling asleep imminently, but they're open.

[Grace @gracecamille_]

You met me at a very hunter biden time of my life

[Uncle Pongo @unclepongo]

Is there an abnormal amount of penis size discourse right now or did I damage my algorithm somehow?

[Uncle Pongo @unclepongo]

Really struggling to find a reply under this video that doesn't make me embarrassed to be a man.

[Killa 🌺 @KillaKreww]

Sharon Stone gets emotional talking about the moment her marriage ended after her husband got FURIOUS over her decision to have a double mastectomy and breast removal due to a breast tumor instead of focusing on her health 😳💔👀

“He was furious. And the doctor said to him, ‘If I had more patients like her, we’d have more women alive today. You need to sit down.I said, ‘I make the decisions, not you.’ That was the end of the marriage.”

[Uncle Pongo @unclepongo]

Does anybody have a toaster I can borrow

[Uncle Pongo @unclepongo]

I don't know if this is a good selfie but it exists. Kinda like me.

[Uncle Pongo @unclepongo]

Foot scan incoming

[HIDEO_KOJIMA @HIDEO_KOJIMA_EN]

With director Martin Scorsese🙇🏻🙏🫶

[Uncle Pongo @unclepongo]

Feeling validated in never watching love island because this is how I feel about audio of kissing scenes in any piece of media ever. Disingenuously loud.

[nathalie @natssantos_]

The kissing sounds on love island USA need to be turned DOWN

[Uncle Pongo @unclepongo]

If I tweet good enough will somebody love me

[Uncle Pongo @unclepongo]

Hacks Season 1? Good.

[Uncle Pongo @unclepongo]

Lemon-Pepper Buffalo Chicken Thighs with Garlic Cauliflower Rice and Roasted Brussel Sprouts. Acknowledge me.