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[RN @upminster13]

We really have lost any idea of justice in this country , these animals should have been put away for life

[Prisca ❤️🇺🇲🫡 @priscabdrO]

11, 12, and 14 years old.

Raped for days by more than 20 Pakistani immigrants.

Tortured—one had her tongue nailed to the wall to keep her still while they raped her.

The police ridiculed, insulted, and ignored them.

The feminists turned the other way.

If it hadn't been for Elon Musk, who publicly shared the trial testimonies, sparking outrage from Reform UK and internal investigations, no one would have known anything.

You're not angry enough.

- @babetta123

[Katie Hopkins @KTHopkins]

Many people owe the 12 year old (now 13) Scottish girl an apology.

You first @PoliceScotland

And you @freddiesayers - you posh twat

And you #narinder-heres-my-flange

God bless those girls. And well done mum

[RN @upminster13]

My dog swallowed a load of Scrabble tiles, so I took him to the vet but not a word yet.

[RN @upminster13]

I failed to win the Viagra-eating contest because of the stiff competition

[RN @upminster13]

English can be weird, because "It can be understood through tough thorough thought, though." is a completely normal statement

[RN @upminster13]

If a doctor eats an apple a day, does he go away?

[RN @upminster13]

I found a wooden shoe in the toilet, and realized it was clogged.

[RN @upminster13]

My father ran the marathon and my mother ran the 1500 meters so I grew up with mixed race parents.

[RN @upminster13]

There’s a new TV show about origami on paper view.

[RN @upminster13]

I would tell you a chemistry joke, but the good ones Argon.

[RN @upminster13]

After weeks wondering why my phone kept autocorrecting "surely" to "Shirley", I realized I'd left it in Airplane mode.

[RN @upminster13]

Good News, I've entered the World Agoraphobia Championships.

Bad News, I have an outside chance of winning.

[RN @upminster13]

I was given 4 E's and LSD last night...

What an awful start to a game of Scrabble!

[RN @upminster13]

My hairdresser asked if I wanted my haircut round the back.
I asked, “Why? Isn’t the shop big enough?

[RN @upminster13]

I asked the librarian if she knew of any authors who wrote dinosaur novels.

She said, "Yes, try Sarah Topps.”

[RN @upminster13]

My grandad tried to warn everybody the Titanic was going to hit the iceberg and sink, but no matter how many people he told, or how loud he shouted, everybody just ignored him, until in the end they threw him out of cinema.

[RN @upminster13]

I'd put on a lot of weight, so I decided to phone Weight Watchers.
I asked if they could send somebody round.
They replied: "No problem, we've got lots of them."

[RN @upminster13]

I struggle with counting Roman numerals until I reach 159. Then it CLIX.

[RN @upminster13]

You ever try blindfold archery?

You don't know what you're missing.

[RN @upminster13]

Only just had my Christmas Dinner. Those slow cookers are ****** rubbish!!..