Nsikak Umoren

[Nsikak Umoren @urbanemperors]

@nigerianoise @DrJoeAbah Why didn't the Osun state government instigate a legal action against him. If that had been done, we wouldn't be here... I come in peace

[Nsikak Umoren @urbanemperors]

@Manu_Sisti Send

[Nsikak Umoren @urbanemperors]

@MrCharlesky I'm interested

[David Hundeyin @DavidHundeyin]

A little snippet from yesterday's chat on @JamarlThomas's livestream where I addressed once and for all the criticism regarding "military dictatorship" and "closure of democratic spaces" in the AES.

Because I think it's time we start telling ourselves hard realities.

[Nsikak Umoren @urbanemperors]

@Candy0__i 1 person, the killer. Those alive must have fled

[Nsikak Umoren @urbanemperors]

@elonmuskPBG 2

[Nsikak Umoren @urbanemperors]

@mindshiftorg And where is the place of the court of law in all of these?

[Nsikak Umoren @urbanemperors]

@ruffydfire It's IG Etim Inyang that IBB queried, not Ibrahim Gambo

[Nsikak Umoren @urbanemperors]

@FiberOne_help @layiwasabi How can it take you not respond to your customers...four days counting

[Nsikak Umoren @urbanemperors]

@FiberOne_help @layiwasabi I've been calling your office to resolve a problem since Wednesday and up till now no technician has showed up. I'm the one suffering the loss

[Eyo Eyo, PhD @Eyowhite3]

Please get your copy below instantly:

📌Retweet & share.
📌Like & reply "yes".
📌Follow.

Click the link below and sign up for a copy:
https://t.co/ktNoEmeWus

[Nsikak Umoren @urbanemperors]

@Eyowhite3 Pls send copy. Thanks

[Nsikak Umoren @urbanemperors]

@iamscrummy_ @Iptv_service_ng I'm having problems saving channels to favourite.
It's very cumbersome for me to be looking for channels manually.
Pls can anyone help

[Nsikak Umoren @urbanemperors]

@meelonmuskusa 56

[Nsikak Umoren @urbanemperors]

@riyazmd774 Send

[David Hundeyin @DavidHundeyin]

The Nigerian idea of an elite school is one where you pay a boatload of money for your kids to be "educated" in the syllabus of a country 6,000 miles away, by people who do not look or sound like you, and who come from a completely different historical and civilisational context to your West African reality.

There, they take your kids through the British Key Stage 1-4 assessments where your kids are taught the history of 20th Century Europe, focusing on the Dreadnought, Trench Foot, Mustard Gas, and how Brave, Plucky Britain saved the world from the German threat twice. Despite receiving this education in Africa's largest city, their own West African history is not even a footnote - it simply doesn't exist as far as this syllabus is concerned.

In their Physics class, they are assigned questions like, "Which of the following temperature readings is a fairly warm day? a) -3⁰C b) 5⁰C c) 19⁰C d) 9⁰C"

Despite the evidence of the West African air outside the window telling them that 19⁰C is actually one of the coldest settings on the classroom AC, and cannot possibly be a "fairly warm day" in Lagos - which regularly hits 34⁰C - they learn to pick C as the answer.

Your kids come out at 17, tremendously educated, enlightened, and certified in knowledge and career pathways that have nothing to do with the reality of the society and economy that they live in. From there, they proceed straight to the UK/US/Canada/Australia/Switzerland/France to continue their education and graduate, after which most of them will remain there and contribute to those societies, occasionally uploading a "🇳🇬" flag on October 1 and taking a photo with Jollof rice at @FoodPitanga, because that's all that Nigeria means to them.

After 2 children and a divorce at 42, they will then take a 6 month break from work and travel to Nigeria to find themselves, which usually means getting into a torrid affair with a shekpeteri boy/girl that inevitably leads to severe character development. They then pack up the newly learned lessons and move back to Houston, after which they write a self-published book with a pretentious indigenous name about a girl who travels to the land of her ancestors to find meaning, and becomes friends with a river goddess.

The book sells 15 copies on Amazon and has two 5-star ratings from friends and family.

If you're lucky and they return to Nigeria immediately after studying, they inevitably end up working in Wealth Management at Chapel Hill Denham, where they pointlessly and relentlessly shift money from one rich man's pocket to another without expanding the economy by a single naira; or they launch an app that achieves 2,500 downloads and spends all its funding runway on Marketing and the founder's lifestyle expenditure; or they end up selling "luxury" real estate on behalf of developers who are daddy's friends.

Or they fall off the surface of the earth altogether, and end up in rehab at a quiet private facility in Tema, after developing an expensive cocaine habit in Lagos.

eLiTe eDucAtIon, ladies and gentlemen.

[Nsikak Umoren @urbanemperors]

@FiberOne_help Dear Fibre One team, pls treat this service ID: FOB44946. it's unfortunate that I'm compelled to come and complain here

[Nsikak Umoren @urbanemperors]

@TheMsterDoctor1 Pls do you have books/materials on data Analysis, kindly share. Thanks

[Reuben Abati @abati1990]

Emefiele: ‘Two persons can’t answer the crimes’, probe Buhari, ex-ministers, others – Sani tells Tinubu https://t.co/PRBTRbPqVX

[Nsikak Umoren @urbanemperors]

@dayoisrael @Mr_JAGs Apapa LG. Precisely Ijora axis inbound and outbound Apapa by Iganmu interchange