Waffleb0arded

Type of guy to get bottle service at Red Lobster

[Waffleb0arded @waffleb0arded]

Double bogey type of morning? Already forgot about it. Next play. No one’s coming to save you.

Thx.
Sent from my iPhone

[Waffleb0arded @waffleb0arded]

Puddlemaxxed last night. That’s fine though because I’m up. Gym, tan, laundry. What are you chuds doing today?

[Waffleb0arded @waffleb0arded]

Welp. It’s summer again… time to fire this hot rod back up and give the fans what they deserve. It’s Thursday and I’m feeling like a slotted trottsman 🐎🐎 Are we feeling Lincoln tonight???

[Waffleb0arded @waffleb0arded]

Anyone know where I can purchase premium chum? Going sharking in Southie tonight….. #AliceInCapoLand

[Waffleb0arded @waffleb0arded]

I’ll take a Goldschläger with water please. Extra rocks, no fruit, and I swear to god if you put a straw in that puppy my drink is going to become part of your wardrobe.

[Waffleb0arded @waffleb0arded]

Espresso just started playing at the beach bar and I went absolutely nuts.

[Waffleb0arded @waffleb0arded]

Deep eddy water make daddy happy

[Waffleb0arded @waffleb0arded]

Just asked if what I was hearing was the national anthem or the star spangled banner. Probably not my best moment. Yeah I’ll do one more kettle one soda with a splash of cran btw

[Waffleb0arded @waffleb0arded]

I honestly can’t imagine being from anywhere else. Bury me in the Lorettas urinal.

[Waffleb0arded @waffleb0arded]

Spamming belt squats today, need a way bigger bamskiiiiii #BobIsABulldog

[Waffleb0arded @waffleb0arded]

If there was a way to freebase Somewhere I Belong by Linkin Park, I would have already done it probably either using a crack pipe or some tin foil and a lighter. Holy shit that song gets me so fired up, I want it flowing through every vein in my body.

[Waffleb0arded @waffleb0arded]

Redbull everclear with a lime CBTM

[Carl Spackler Jr @coddlebury]

Officially cut off after 4 drinks… shrink boon. Would rather give my money to Hamas then spend another dollar in this junk joint. #istilloveboon #downwiththepatriarchy

[Waffleb0arded @waffleb0arded]

How are you guys getting home????? Uhhhhh how about you stay put and hand me my Cruise missile, thanks booze boy.

[Waffleb0arded @waffleb0arded]

Chomping at the bit right now, Boone St has no talent and this drink tastes like the port-a potty at Hampton Beach @BubbaHicks3 @coddlebury