Melanie Irish

[Melanie Irish @webeirish]

Note to self: don't try to download an app when taking a shit. Your Face ID will not recognize you, lol

[Melanie Irish @webeirish]

@MizzouPsych @Mizzou It has been wonderful working with the faculty and staff in the
@MizzouPsych
department the past 20 of 25 years.

[Melanie Irish @webeirish]

I just figured out a shortcut to add a filter to every column in Excel quickly and I am so happy. This is where I'm at in my life, lol.

[Melanie Irish @webeirish]

I don't want to work but I also don't want to bang on the drum all day. A day at the spa sounds nice.

[ColumbiaPD @ColumbiaPD]

*Please RT* Have you seen this runaway teen? CPD & family are asking for the community's help in locating her. She was last seen today @ approx. 3:00pm @ Midway Travel Plaza. Read more: https://t.co/t9WIn3Aqjy #CoMo

[Steve Howey @stevehowey]

You always know a good parent when they lovingly talk shit about their own kids.

[Mike Birbiglia @birbigs]

🎶 On the first day of Christmas Bob Mueller gave to me...🎶

[ColumbiaPD @ColumbiaPD]

Trinity Spohn, 13, white female, approx. 5’03” & approx.125 pounds. Spohn has shoulder length blk hair & brn eyes. https://t.co/b6JRMa6GML

[Chuck Kaylor @chuck_kaylor]

"I'm against picketing, but I don't know how to show it." @M_Hedberg #friyay

[Melanie Irish @webeirish]

@TheIrishCyclist is probably getting laid tonight.

[Melanie Irish @webeirish]

@JeffRouder Are you wanting the e-book option only or the e-book with Launchpad? I need to ISBN for one or the other.

[Melanie Irish @webeirish]

@JeffRouder Please check your university email. I need your textbook order.

[Mike Birbiglia @birbigs]

I wonder if they'd consider a 4th debate that has NO issues but rather Donald and Hillary holograms singing Michael Jackson covers. #debate

[James Corden @JKCorden]

I'm going furniture shopping with @realDonaldTrump tomorrow and I gotta be honest,the whole vibe to it feels different now.

[Connor Ratliff 🎭 @connorratliff]

Just realized that U.S. History books will now have to include the phrase "grab them by the pussy." Good luck, future teachers!

[Trevor Noah @Trevornoah]

"No ma'am, I was not taking video of your child, I came to this park to catch Pokemon."

#PokemonGO

[Melanie Irish @webeirish]

Best friends are the greatest. @bridget_larue

[Melanie Irish @webeirish]

I miss the spice girls. #patioataudras

[Melanie Irish @webeirish]

I found this while searching foot pain issues. #thetruthispainful #soisfootpain