Adam Wert

Academic advisor with a PhD in systematic theology. What's next?

[James Surowiecki @JamesSurowiecki]

Just figured out where these fake tariff rates come from. They didn't actually calculate tariff rates + non-tariff barriers, as they say they did. Instead, for every country, they just took our trade deficit with that country and divided it by the country's exports to us.

So we have a $17.9 billion trade deficit with Indonesia. Its exports to us are $28 billion. $17.9/$28 = 64%, which Trump claims is the tariff rate Indonesia charges us. What extraordinary nonsense this is.

[Icona @iconawrites]

90% of writing a book is just having the courage to look at how bad your draft is and staying there at the desk trying to fix it instead of running away.

[Franklin Leonard @franklinleonard]

Hey, Matt, I hear you like ‘em young.

[Kei @RealMamaEagle]

MAKE JALEN THROW, THEY SAID.

FUCK Y’ALL.

[🎃✨America Is Musty✨🎃 @DragonflyJonez]

Eagles whupping ass so thoroughly that I feel like it’s not even the time to have a convo w/KC it’s time to have a convo w/the AFC. Like these the dudes yall cant do a damn thing with? It’s such a thorough ass whupping that I need to ask the Bills wtf they got going on over there

[Angie Thomas @angiecthomas]

Please keep this up, Eagles, because the Abbott Elementary episode is going to be top tier

[Sweet Meteor O'Death @smod4real]

Never realized how much the Chiefs depended on funding from USAID

[Katherine Everitt 💥 @katherineveritt]

Guy last night told me “Oh Hegel is the thesis, antithesis, synthesis guy” and I said “no, that’s a common misconception.” Twenty minutes later he showed me his AI Google result that said this. So I killed myself. 🫰🏻

[Associate Deans @ass_deans]

We need to find something for our biggest donor to do. So please join me in welcoming our new Dean for Efficiency and Innovation. See we told we would stay committed to DEI!

[kevinwhector @kevinwhector]

Types of Good Teacher (a non-exhaustive list):

1. The Enthusiast: this is the kind of teacher who gets really excited about ideas--in books, in class discussion, in their minds, wherever. Examples include Meghan Sullivan, Jonathan Tran, and Stanley Hauerwas.

[Associate Deans @ass_deans]

As you travel, always wear college swag and aggressively engage any teenager you see. We are all in recruiting and admissions now!

[inefficient rhubarb snackowski @snackowska]

kinda miss the lecture format where the prof would ramble for two hours and occasionally write a name or date on the blackboard, connecting it via impressionist arrows to other words (all illegible) until the board looked like it was webbed by a giant drunk chalk spider

[hot dam historian 🦅 @hotdamhistorian]

the right time was 2022. also 2026 is coming up. win some house seats! win local seats! hundreds of local seats are uncontested because the democratic party doesn't contest them!

[Tom Carpenter, PhD (@tcarpenter.bsky.social) @tcarpenter216]

The lack of fundamental probability knowledge in society is painful. If my doctor said this, I’d be elated.

[inefficient rhubarb snackowski @snackowska]

as one of my profs used to say "just because many readings can be right doesn't mean all of them are"

[inefficient rhubarb snackowski @snackowska]

the main goal of the humanities should be to stop people from humiliating themselves with their incorrect readings of Nabokov

[Hadas Weiss @weiss_hadas]

one time on campus my phone connected to eduroam

[Associate Deans @ass_deans]

All of the advisors were replaced by ChatGPT.

[“Boiling Heart’s Blood” Cassie @Angry_Cassie]

Academic wedding speech bingo card:
- excellent sign-posting
- “a way in which”
- specific sections w intros & conclusions
- referencing/explaining niche research areas as the context for describing someone/the speech
- “in a sense”
- lasts 15 minutes
- ends with a quote

[inefficient rhubarb snackowski @snackowska]

"the best dissertation is a done dissertation" okay but maybe the best dissertation is the dissertation you thought about and then didn't write but instead hid deep in your unconscious where it will softly scream at you for the next twenty years while your nerves unravel