Martin Turner

one and two wheels in Hong Kong

[Martin Turner @Wheeliefine]

@StigOfHK @johnherbert Gosh!

[Martin Turner @Wheeliefine]

@John_von_Ruden @historyinmemes Your imaginary enemies are doing imaginary things to your imagined homeland. Smite them from your mind!

[Martin Turner @Wheeliefine]

UK poll puts Count Binface ahead of Nobby Farage.
(alas, not Clacton-specific)
https://t.co/tXSbm5zPVT

[Martin Turner @Wheeliefine]

@TweetinderKaul * In the local CBD:

[Martin Turner @Wheeliefine]

@PaddyBriggs * CAPSLOCK WALKED INTO A BAR.

[Martin Turner @Wheeliefine]

@JonnyLus * A driml tu[ost wa ;led omtp a bar/

[Martin Turner @Wheeliefine]

@soyprati * A regular comma walked into a bar, alone.

[RC deWinter @RCdeWinter]

A grammar book walks into a bar

* An Oxford comma walks into a bar, where it spends the evening watching the television, getting drunk, and smoking cigars.

* A dangling participle walks into a bar. Enjoying a cocktail and chatting with the bartender, the evening passes pleasantly.

* A bar was walked into by the passive voice.

* An oxymoron walked into a bar, and the silence was deafening.

* Two quotation marks walk into a “bar.”

* A malapropism walks into a bar, looking for all intents and purposes like a wolf in cheap clothing, muttering epitaphs and casting dispersions on his magnificent other, who takes him for granite.

* Hyperbole totally rips into this insane bar and absolutely destroys everything.

* A question mark walks into a bar?

* A non sequitur walks into a bar.
In a strong wind, even turkeys can fly.

* Papyrus and Comic Sans walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Get out -- we don't serve your type."

* A mixed metaphor walks into a bar, seeing the handwriting on the wall but hoping to nip it in the bud.

* A comma splice walks into a bar, it has a drink and then leaves.

* Three intransitive verbs walk into a bar. They sit. They converse. They depart.

* A synonym strolls into a tavern.

* At the end of the day, a cliché walks into a bar -- fresh as a daisy, cute as a button, and sharp as a tack.

* A run-on sentence walks into a bar it starts flirting. With a cute little sentence fragment.

* Falling slowly, softly falling, the chiasmus collapses to the bar floor.

* A figure of speech literally walks into a bar and ends up getting figuratively hammered.

* An allusion walks into a bar, despite the fact that alcohol is its Achilles heel.

* The subjunctive would have walked into a bar, had it only known.

* A misplaced modifier walks into a bar owned by a man with a glass eye named Ralph.

* The past, present, and future walked into a bar. It was tense.

* A dyslexic walks into a bra.

* A verb walks into a bar, sees a beautiful noun, and suggests they conjugate. The noun declines.

* A simile walks into a bar, as parched as a desert.

* A gerund and an infinitive walk into a bar, drinking to forget.

* A hyphenated word and a non-hyphenated word walk into a bar and the bartender nearly chokes on the irony .

– Jill Thomas Doyle

[Martin Turner @Wheeliefine]

An ancient prophecy, perhaps about to be realised.

[Martin Turner @Wheeliefine]

As the World Cup moves up a gear, here’s a classic game:
���The Philosopher's Football Match‘
https://t.co/hwnyBfmjwi

[Martin Turner @Wheeliefine]

Insightful BBC Persian profile of how the US-Iran deal is going down inside that country.
https://t.co/vwBuKZTJsU

[Martin Turner @Wheeliefine]

In a macabre coincidence, 168 people died in each of the Tai Po fire and the US strike on a girls' school in Iran.

[Martin Turner @Wheeliefine]

Two more incidents of pedestrians hit by motor vehicles while walking on the pavement. None were wearing helmets. When will they ever learn?
https://t.co/s8xFgY0H1h
https://t.co/J6f2QrMLwJ

[Martin Turner @Wheeliefine]

@LP1980AA @Probably99 Public resources mis-applied again :-(

[Martin Turner @Wheeliefine]

@docmartinhk Apparently, this was an entirely human snafu. The machine was doing a pre-programmed sequence, initiated and supposedly monitored by a human operator. The organisers shouldn't have had the audience that close, and should have intervened.
(based on my detailed chat with Grok)

[Martin Turner @Wheeliefine]

@kjoules @tripperhead Looks like the one at the end of the Kai Tak runway.

[Martin Turner @Wheeliefine]

@HKnumberplates Now we know why those cars need that ridiculously high front end.

[Adam Tranter @adamtranter]

Bicycles are hugely space efficient, which is why they make a lot of sense in congested cities. This video demonstrates why there aren’t traffic jams in bike lanes.

[Martin Turner @Wheeliefine]

@transit_jam @johnherbert On a busy TST waterfront they other day, e-bike delivery guys were blasting past at around 25 mph. Infuriating as I try to encourage considerate sharing among wheeled and walkers.

[Martin Turner @Wheeliefine]

@transit_jam It is getting worse, I've noticed too.