Peter Turner

Moderately tortured comedy writer and music teacher. New comedy horror thriller, "The Wyvern & The Witchfinder" available from all bad bookshops.

[Peter Turner @whoster_peter]

@JonathanPieNews Jonathan, you deserve much happiness for using that wonderful old term 'shitehawk.' Couldn't have been more aptly used, either.

[Peter Turner @whoster_peter]

@NewStatesman @AndrewMarr9 If you're still looking for a term for this volatile group of voters, I'll throw my hat into the ring with 'Mid-Life Mavericks.' Oh well, you don't win the raffle etc...

[Peter Turner @whoster_peter]

https://t.co/pq83XTaUN6 A gift pack assortment of peanuts, walnuts, pistachios and almonds would be less nutty than Liz Truss.

[Jemahl Evans @Temulkar]

My lovely publisher has my #Becket novel on a #99p #bookbub deal on #kindle at the moment.

https://t.co/b4K2p2AlOM

#medievaltwitter #history #HistoricalFiction #canterbury #medievalhistory #histfic #bynr

[Peter Turner @whoster_peter]

@MikeTilburn Cheers Mike, hope you enjoy it! Thanks for the retweet too. 👌

[Peter Turner @whoster_peter]

@g_gosden To quote PG Wodehouse, "He was a tubby little chap who looked as if he had been poured into his clothes and had forgotten to say 'when.'

[Peter Turner @whoster_peter]

@MT4tk Thanks Miranda. Yes, I'll make a point of doing so as I'd hope it'd be of interest locally. 👌

[Peter Turner @whoster_peter]

A mystery to rank alongside Mary Celeste and Lord Lucan's disappearance - even if the culprit has desecrated one of Bath's most elegant and ornate pieces of architecture:

[Elon Musk @elonmusk]

Should I step down as head of Twitter? I will abide by the results of this poll.

[Peter Turner @whoster_peter]

Tis the season of goodwill, so nice to see that this bicycle thief got into the festive spirit by at least leaving a wheel behind.

[Peter Turner @whoster_peter]

@BritainElects @RedfieldWilton Wonder what odds I'd get on Truss becoming Britain's longest serving PM? Probably similar odds to Elvis and Lord Lucan being found riding Shergar on Weston-super-Mare beach.

[Peter Turner @whoster_peter]

@RedfieldWilton Keep up the good work, Liz. 👍 😁 👏👏👏👌

[Peter Turner @whoster_peter]

@OldTrot @BNHWalker @BritainElects That's sometimes the case, but massive tactical voting in 97 between Lab and Lib Dem voters lost Tories far more seats. Tactical voting works when there's a large anti-govt electorate, but not when it's small like in 2019.

[Peter Turner @whoster_peter]

@trickytree2 @YouGov So why would a polling company co-founded by a current Tory cabinet minister want to show the Tories doing worse than they are? Not sure how that fits into your totally unfounded conspiracy drivel.

[Peter Turner @whoster_peter]

@StephenJCooke1 @YouGov All polls are fake unless they show the Tories leading? Breathtaking ignorance and denial worthy of a Trump supporter.

[Peter Turner @whoster_peter]

@YouGov Sure this will excite the Daily Mail: DOMINANT LIZ SLASHES LABOUR LEAD BY 3%!

[Peter Turner @whoster_peter]

@PickardJE Yes of course. Personally, I blame Clement Attlee's post-war Labour government for this current crisis with the pound, while dear old Liz and Kwasi are innocent and totally sane, and whom the markets aren't at all terrified of...

[Peter Turner @whoster_peter]

@JAHeale @MrHarryCole @HarperCollins Would make the perfect gift for that special person you hate.

[Peter Turner @whoster_peter]

@QatarCreates Piss off. Would rather holiday in Weston-super-Mare than visit a place with such appalling human rights abuses. And how the hell Beckham can be used to advertise art is beyond me.

[Peter Turner @whoster_peter]

@indiebookpromos The splendour of Georgian Bath plays host to a multitude of horrifying and hilarious supernatural incidents...It's enough to make Jane Austen turn somersaults in her grave!
https://t.co/em3mejl6SJ