achilles: got called gay in troy the other day
patroclus: what happened?
achilles: got called gay in troy
patroclus: yes, but why?
achilles: i was being gay
patroclus: in troy?
achilles: yeah it was in troy
i saw a post by @wrongptrchlls and had to apply the quote to the biggest patrochilles kinnies of all time - alexander and hephaestion
((it’s funny cuz he very much DID stab him what a healthy normal man))
odysseus: i'm leaving now. menelaus is in charge. i've left notes for each of you with instructions
achilles: mine just says "achilles no"
odysseus: and you can apply that to any situation
patroclus: are you a cuddler?
achilles: i’ve killed multiple people, i'm a machine of death and destruction
patroclus:
achilles: ...yeah, i'm a cuddler
patroclus: could you ever see us being more than friends?
achilles: yes! i’m so happy you asked!
patroclus: really? because i-
achilles: i can totally see us as gods!
patroclus: ...
achilles: hang on, let me find the picture i drew!!!