Lil UTI Vert

a jaguar that went through human puberty

[Lil UTI Vert @yoloragebro]

Starting a tender collection of dating app messages I’ve sent that have inspired boys to stop messaging forever. I stand by 100% of them.

[Lil UTI Vert @yoloragebro]

Working in advertising is just emailing 30 min availabilities back and forth until you die.

[Lil UTI Vert @yoloragebro]

Nathan For You is the new Infinite Jest

[Lil UTI Vert @yoloragebro]

A “cuck”??? You mean a TEAM PLAYER?

[Lil UTI Vert @yoloragebro]

Picking suddenly Seymour at karaoke should lower your credit score

[Lil UTI Vert @yoloragebro]

“Audrey Hepburn” - Coco Chanel

[Lil UTI Vert @yoloragebro]

@agvass24 Actually it is true I’m sorry no one told you

[Lil UTI Vert @yoloragebro]

Did everyone else already know Brick is short for Brichard and just not ever talk about it

[Lil UTI Vert @yoloragebro]

Mountain Dew Kickstart is good for you

[Lil UTI Vert @yoloragebro]

Brunette can’t pull off ME tbh

[Lil UTI Vert @yoloragebro]

If god wanted me to be brunette she would not have invented peroxide amen

[Lil UTI Vert @yoloragebro]

@cadetkelley So is this just recreational reflux instead of functional?

[Lil UTI Vert @yoloragebro]

@Pramsey08 Go touchdowns!

[Lil UTI Vert @yoloragebro]

@Capri_Sun make a hard seltzer you cowards

[Lil UTI Vert @yoloragebro]

@cadetkelley Same tbh

[Lil UTI Vert @yoloragebro]

Crypto is just astrology for men!!!!!!!!

[Lil UTI Vert @yoloragebro]

Good news fuckos I learned basic animation so the world will never again be safe from my “unique perspective”

[Lil UTI Vert @yoloragebro]

@KrisStil @cadetkelley @agvass24 Not for you

[Lil UTI Vert @yoloragebro]

@cadetkelley @agvass24 Hakuna Dentata 🥲

[Lil UTI Vert @yoloragebro]

I’ve reached “interviewing my cat with a pretend microphone” single

[Lil UTI Vert @yoloragebro]

@Mary_Buzbee That’s me! 🤗 THANK YOU for making this possible!!!!

[Lil UTI Vert @yoloragebro]

@jjaxtweets Patented technique

[Lil UTI Vert @yoloragebro]

Best way to road test your makeup is trying on the faces you make for men. Ex: I am listening to a long story to earn shots for my friends