*at a restaurant, when someone begins choking*
His wife: “PLEASE HE’S NOT BREATHING SOMEONE CALL HIM A DOCTOR”
Me: *raises hand hesitantly*
“YES WHAT, WHAT IS IT??”
Me: “...He’s a doctor”
*choking guy finger guns, winks, and dies*
@DownToDunk Fun fact: the Thunder’s active win streak is as much or more than 21 other teams’ win totals.
If they win tonight and the Celtics beat the Raptors it will be as much or more than every team in the Eastern Conference except Detroit (26 total across the league)
Taxpayers give this $40/day spot away for free.
There’s 3 million parking spots in NYC, if $10/spot/day was paid that’s $30 Million a day, or $10 Billion a year.
NYC taxpayers give $10 Billion in parking to drivers every year
Frog came into the house.
”Toad,” said Frog, “your pants and jacket are lying on the floor.”
“Tomorrow,” said Toad from under the covers.
“Your kitchen sink is filled with dirty dishes,” said Frog.
“Tomorrow,” said Toad.
“Don’t put all your eggs in one basket”
you’re telling me if I went over to your house right now I’d find multiple baskets, all with between 1 and 11 eggs??