Someone on Twitter asked, “If you got stupendously rich and didn’t tell anyone, what would be the signs people would see?”
Ladies and gentlemen, you already know I have answers… here’s a short list of my silent Billionaire -in Dollars- behaviour.
1. My go-to DAILY fashion style would be Boubou, Gen-Z Denim and T-shirts, and baggy joggers and T-shirts. The only way you’ll know that I have Billions of dollars that I can even leave behind for generations is a 10-carat Diamond on my ears and a 100-carat tennis necklace on my neck. Jewellery will be the sign ladies and gentlemen… I can’t help myself on that one.
2.Only me by myself will see Davido in public and wag my index finger at him pe, “David, you’re a bad boy. You’re a very bad boy.” If he says, “Who the f#ck are you to speak to me that way?” I’ll just waka pass and smile in billions of dollars then call his team one week later to ask him to come and be my alarm for the next two to three days.
3.Ah! It will be difficult for my friends not to know that I have landed GBIM! Because small complaints, I’ll say, let’s go to Bali and Yoga it out beside Elephants.
4.I’ll be commuting from the moon and back. No time to spend 12 months a year on earth, you people’s wahala is too much.
5.I will be sitting on the stage during Burna, Rihanna, and Usher’s concerts. They’ll have to be moving and dancing around me which means my seat has to be a rotating one. If I like, I tap them to repeat the same song because I didn’t feel the first performance well.
6.I need to buy Arsenal and shut it down. What a stressful football team!
7.Finally for now, (Only because I’m tired of typing) I will never ever admit to anyone that I have Billions and Billions of Dollars. What’s the point? I need Twitter people to say I’m either faking it or that I’m a sugar baby. Then I’ll type “LOL” in response.
#DANG