Zoelle Egner

Fiber art, experimental lit, ARGs. She/her. Very tall. Now: @brightharborco. Then: Crocodoc, Box, Airtable, VaccinateCA, Block Party. Always early.

[Zoelle Egner @zoelle]

Proposal: let's create "Gerrymandering: The Jigsaw Puzzle"—a puzzle of all voting districts in the USA— and donate copies to every school.

[Zoelle Egner @zoelle]

@matt_beard_ Send me some ambitious generalists who want to tackle real problems!! Disaster recovery needs this energy desperately and we have a generational opportunity to make it massively better right now!

[Zoelle Egner @zoelle]

@patio11 Insurance companies want to pay exactly the correct amount. They do not want to deal with PAs or lawsuits. (But they are not gonna put extra effort into that, and most people don't properly understand that the burden of proof is structurally on them, not insurance.)

[Zoelle Egner @zoelle]

@Romy_Holland I deeply resent when others gaslight women about the pain. (That said, my own gaslighting *myself* worked great- walked in to an accidentally natural birth because I kept telling myself "it's ok I'll get the epidural once it gets worse than this" til I was holding a baby.)

[Zoelle Egner @zoelle]

@kitten_beloved We also don't have a TV and wow I wish my 3.5 had similar lack of imagination for gifts 😭 anyway, back to looking up tutorials for how to make a puppet lion

[Zoelle Egner @zoelle]

@blightersort Child of divorce and it was 1000% better post-divorce

[Zoelle Egner @zoelle]

It obviously hurt a ton and was very intense, but not in a "rendered incapable of speech" kind of way. Gallstones hurt way worse. Inability to talk is a terrible barometer for how far along you are in labor.

[Zoelle Egner @zoelle]

I literally never reached the point where I couldn't talk because of contractions. I came in bc I'd been in "false labor" for 48 hr, had a nice chat w the nurses, was told the baby sounded great but my vitals were a little up. Checked dilation, then admitted asap bc I was at 9 🤷‍♀️

[Laura @sloeginpsyop]

I called the doctor three times that evening, which was exactly what they said I should do, and here’s how every convo went:

“My contractions are now 2-3 minutes apart and very intense, should I come in?”

“Um, sigh, well….thats kinda up to you, but we really don’t need to see you until you’re in active labor.”

“Well (breathing heavily and unable to speak well during intense contractions)…h..how do I know if I’m in active labor?”

“Well, there’s no way to know for sure, but you won’t be able to really talk during contractions.”

“That’s ….me….. now..”

“Well it seems a bit too soon for that, try to get some sleep.”

“Sorry there’s zero chance I’m sleeping through this, I’m writhing in pain every 3 minutes.”

“Sigh, well, I’m not here to tell you what to do, just inform your decisions…”

(Why the fuck do they tell me to call then) “Um, ok, I think I need to come in.”

“If that’s what you want.”

“It’s not about what I WANT, I’m just saying if I’m having the baby in the hospital I should probably come to the hospital.”

“Sigh, yeah, we can check your dilation when you get here.”

I drive 45 minutes to the hospital and check in and get into a bed, a somewhat perturbed nurse checks me “you’re only 4 cm, at this point we usually recommend you return home to get some rest then come back during active labor).”

“So you want me to drive 45 minutes back home, writhe around there, then sort of magically feel out when I think I might be 1 more cm dilated and then drive 45 minutes back here?”

“Yes, and try to get some sleep.”

-____-

Everything after this was great but the entire when-to-go-to-the-hospital situation was needlessly frustrating.

[Zoelle Egner @zoelle]

@ChrisJBakke @BillAckman @ZohranKMamdani He strikes me as a Blackhawk guy

[Zoelle Egner @zoelle]

@luinalaska Requires sincere effort to get an image to form. But I get direct metadata with no effort at all, very quickly, which is usually much more useful.

[Zoelle Egner @zoelle]

@maiab I used to discover that sidewalks literally just...stopped mid block in la

[Zoelle Egner @zoelle]

@EigenGender Eating breakfast, drinking coffee, scrolling recipes trying to decide what to make for dinner, wondering why my toddler has been in the bathroom for so long and if I'm going to find a mess when I get in there

[Zoelle Egner @zoelle]

@maiab For what it's worth, in the future if someone is offering to do this, might be worth trying to reframe for yourself as an opportunity to let someone else feel good about themselves ♥️

[Zoelle Egner @zoelle]

3 am is not my fav time for an earthquake

[Zoelle Egner @zoelle]

@AlfieJCarter Bible

[Zoelle Egner @zoelle]

@amphichrome_

[Zoelle Egner @zoelle]

@DeanFiacco Inbox

[Zoelle Egner @zoelle]

@ashleymayer They're already pretty good but we could hang out more 👀

[NWS Bay Area 🌉 @NWSBayArea]

Friends please be aware, a Tsunami is a series of wave carrying a large extra mass of water to our coast.

This will NOT be a single wave.
Do NOT try to go to the coast to take photos.

You're not just putting yourself at risk, you will also be putting rescue teams at risk. #CAwx

[Zoelle Egner @zoelle]

@KealaniSmith Just want to know if I should move my toddler to higher ground. Deeply unlikely but some warning in advance would be useful, you know

[Zoelle Egner @zoelle]

It is pretty deeply unacceptable that the California state tsunami website isn't working during a coast-wide tsunami alert.