Zola Ray

Features Contributor @TheOnion. Contributor @Reductress. Words @Betches_Sup @LittleOldLady__ @FlexxMag. she/her

[Jeva Lange 🫎 @Jee_vuh]

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[Zola Ray @zolamray]

@svershbow @eileencartter Project Runway was my first thought!

[Zola Ray @zolamray]

I was just talking about how in my lifetime I noticed it switched from “nitch” to “neesh”

[Oxtail Pricing Specialist @simsimmaaz]

Do you say Neesh or Nitch for the word "Niche". Both pronounciations are accepted but I've always said Niche (neesh) and someone made fun of me and I was so confused lmaooo

[Zola Ray @zolamray]

Got this ad on Instagram. Every company is trying to imitate that viral Little Guy

[Zola Ray @zolamray]

Accidentally flicked toothpaste onto my eyelash and it didn’t get in my eye. Fantastic reminder of the evolutionary purpose of eyelashes

[optimusprime @earth_to_annaa]

hire professional voice actors for the national dog show and let them decide how each dog would sound as a person. air it live.

[tera-cotta @notincharge7]

I'm an over-explainer (I explain things too much)

[Zola Ray @zolamray]

When the last word of my text has a typo because autocorrect didn’t get a chance to fix it, it’s like “wow, I really can’t do anything on my own”

[Zola Ray @zolamray]

@deloisivete Googolplex! I just pulled that one out of my brain from childhood

[Zola Ray @zolamray]

What I’m gathering is that this app is now for discourse only, no fun little thoughts allowed

[Zola Ray @zolamray]

Thinking of emptying my Twitter drafts over on Bluesky if that interests anyone

[Zola Ray @zolamray]

Not leaving Twitter just yet but follow me on the other things!

Bluesky: https://t.co/JRGF8JgAqq
Instagram/Threads: uniquelyzola
TikTok: uniquelyzola

[Zola Ray @zolamray]

Me on high-confidence days: I’m pretty

Me on low-confidence days: If you think I’m pretty you probably think Kiki is the rounded one and Bouba is the pointy one

[Zola Ray @zolamray]

I don’t worry about passing the Bechdel test because the things I say about men are profound and on a higher plane

[Zola Ray @zolamray]

John Krasinski is definitely still hot but I know when he got that call in 2024 he looked into the camera like in The Office

[Zola Ray @zolamray]

*pulls away from kissing* Before we take this any further you should know that I’ve got a couple dents in my fender and a couple rips in my jeans

[Zola Ray @zolamray]

Do you think when the body keeps the score it uses one of those old-timey flip scoreboards?

[Josh Gondelman @joshgondelman]

It's always the people who refuse any other kinds of sensitivity in language who want to say "male loneliness epidemic" instead of "being a loser."

[Zola Ray @zolamray]

Not leaving Twitter just yet but follow me on the other things!

Bluesky: https://t.co/JRGF8JgAqq
Instagram/Threads: uniquelyzola
TikTok: uniquelyzola

[Zola Ray @zolamray]

Purposely calling cats “cars” is just “was the grink there?” but for another side of the Internet

[mount bellyache @mountbellyache]

we're living in increasingly unfergalicious times