Primordial Zoomer

[Primordial Zoomer @zoomernova]

Sometimes vices butt heads productively, like when pride prevents me from succumbing to alcoholism

[Primordial Zoomer @zoomernova]

The man made pond beaches of suburban Massachusetts are a case study in why it’s good for humanity to impose its will on nature

[Primordial Zoomer @zoomernova]

Tragic that none of the nicest trucks on the market today have a front bench seat, only cheaper trims do.

Is being rich *and* horny illegal? Why must we choose between luxury and intimacy?

[Primordial Zoomer @zoomernova]

Suburban poster who deletes his account but within days starts walking up to the freshly mown lawns of other neighborhood dads saying “I love it when the grass gets a little overgrown like this”

[Primordial Zoomer @zoomernova]

@xwanyex The guys I work with subsist entirely on fast food and cigarettes when they should be eating like Erling Haaland

[Primordial Zoomer @zoomernova]

The beauty of male friendship

[Primordial Zoomer @zoomernova]

One day my wife will have to explain to our grandchildren that when tiktok attained total cultural hegemony I was summarily executed by the brainrot godking for being an unrepentant mid-sentence stop-and-muller

[Primordial Zoomer @zoomernova]

@jjabbott @Philadeliberty @PhillyJoeD Give me the steel man. Why is it better

[Primordial Zoomer @zoomernova]

@crushkillcrush It’s what we evolved them for

[Primordial Zoomer @zoomernova]

@simonsarris Minimalism is cowardice, every layer is a choice and every choice offers a glimpse of your soul. Far too many prefer not to be seen, least of all by themselves

[Primordial Zoomer @zoomernova]

@NeverendingEvil Only God forgives…

[Primordial Zoomer @zoomernova]

@CruelEvilBeast These frighten me but maybe an emergency stash in the glove compartment wouldn’t hurt

[Primordial Zoomer @zoomernova]

How it feels to wake up too late to make coffee before work

[Primordial Zoomer @zoomernova]

@itsluckypurr @crushkillcrush Crushkillcrush vanished. Tommy Frank and Selkie on hiatus. Timeline in shambles…

[Primordial Zoomer @zoomernova]

@unactuallife Ttfn Tommy Frank

[Primordial Zoomer @zoomernova]

@ofartemisiasilk Sneaky buff bf sleeper ankles gf

[Primordial Zoomer @zoomernova]

If you sit in the parking lot of a Pet Smart around 5pm on a weeknight you will see a procession of rugged men in dirt-stained jeans getting out of giant trucks to pick up kibble for their sweet little angels after a hard day’s work

[Primordial Zoomer @zoomernova]

@crushkillcrush I’d look like frida kahlo if I gave up on the middle

[Primordial Zoomer @zoomernova]

@crushkillcrush Counterpoint
https://t.co/FYZgxYwgdZ

[T.R.4.5.H. @crushkillcrush]

Feels like cum is bubblin out of my eyes rn

[Primordial Zoomer @zoomernova]

@banterrealism https://t.co/WHLpS4CvOV