Ryan Widmer

That’s me telling the doctor I’m fucked up and her saying shit you seem like it lets get you hardcore tested

[Ryan Widmer @0wryguy0]

@ezraklein Wow.. hopefully this will move in reverse

[Noah Klinsky @Jew_Jitsu27]

Girls will be all "save the turtles don't use straws!" Then go right ahead and print out all 248 slides of your BIO 102 powerpoint

[RollerCoaster Tycoon @RCTGuests]

Guest 1486 has died

[Ryan Widmer @0wryguy0]

https://t.co/0nXWqiY0KE

[Ryan Widmer @0wryguy0]

@dollbunyan I’ve just been ruthlessly dumped.. and this gives me hope. Not the assaulted part but everything else sounds fairly chill

[little special™ @dollbunyan]

In the last 9 months I have: learned to drive, been ruthlessly dumped, quit my job, been assaulted, moved across the country, lived in my parents basement, been diagnosed with a new mental disorder, ghostwritten an ep of a tv show, gotten a job w/ animals + people who respect me,

[billy eichner @billyeichner]

.@SenatorCollins @lisamurkowski I mean... c’mon now. He’s a douchebag. He’ll be on the Supreme Court for the rest of our lives. He’s a bad guy. Don’t do it.

[Ryan Widmer @0wryguy0]

@jpatrickzbella @southeastchrist @awakenworship @KyleIdleman Hashtag love Jesus hashtag praisebehim hashtag hehasrisen hashtag allahakbar

[Ryan Widmer @0wryguy0]

@jpatrickzbella Hashtag so true hashtag amirite hashtag later bros

[Ryan Widmer @0wryguy0]

@TheEconomist Is that Michael Scott in the foreground??

[Ryan Widmer @0wryguy0]

@jpatrickzbella Hahaha that’s so funny 0wryguy0

[Ryan Widmer @0wryguy0]

@jpatrickzbella 2sp00ky4me

[Tom Segura AKA Mr. Ladybug @tomsegura]

This is good life advice

[Conrad Hackett @conradhackett]

STATISTICS OF THE YEAR:
Americans killed annually by

All Islamic jihadist terrorists 9
Armed toddlers 21
Lightning 31
Lawnmowers 69
Being hit by a bus 264
Falling out of bed 737
Being shot by another American 11,737
https://t.co/OSAtlR8jnK

[ACLU @ACLU]

Not sure why #NetNeutrality matters?

Imagine if your service provider could stop you from ordering Domino’s online — by slowing down your connection or crashing your browser — because Pizza Hut is paying them. 🍕

[Ryan Widmer @0wryguy0]

@CNN We need more people to challenge elected officials like this

[Chris Hayes @chrislhayes]

The best part of this farce will be when the new Fed chair raises rates next year to totally nullify whatever (small) growth effect there might have been.

[Ryan Widmer @0wryguy0]

@djlavoie @nycsouthpaw All they have to do is repeat that it’s for the middle class and deny anything else. People won’t get it until they file next year ha

[Ryan Widmer @0wryguy0]

@FoxNews Ugh Fox is gonna have a field day with him and his friendship with Obama

[Chuck Schumer @SenSchumer]

RT & tell @FCC this decision will hold America back.
Consumers, small business owners, hospitals & schools across the country will be at the mercy of internet service providers who'll be free to charge for fast lane service & pick winners & losers. #SaveNetNeutrality