TheKingWalker II

....Father, Thinker, Innovator...Lets 🍻🇺🇬

[Mwami lu @lulanzeashirafu]

KAMPALA’S PARADOX: BROKE, BUT EVERYTHING IS BOOKED

Kampala defies economics. Every weekday morning, timelines are full of “money has refused,” “ground is tight,” and screenshots of empty Mobile Money wallets. Ask ten friends for 50k to fix your car and nine will send ICU-level voice notes about money “stuck on the high seas” or a relative struck by lightning. The tenth will blue-tick you forever. Online, the city looks one bad day from returning to the village to farm.

Then Friday 11:30 PM arrives. Try finding parking near a bar in Nakawa, Kololo, Bugolobi, or Kira Road. You won’t. The jam inside the parking lot beats Jinja Road at rush hour. Who’s buying pork platters that wipe out a pig family tree? The same people who were begging in your inbox at 9 AM. We’re a city of professional mourners who cry poverty while holding premium beer. Broke, but broke with class.

Weddings explain it. A couple on entry-level salaries with no savings for a sofa will plan an 80-million-shilling event. They create a WhatsApp group, hold weekly meetings, and pressure friends to pledge 500k. Skip it and you’re labeled a witch. On the day, decorations cost more than the groom’s annual salary. By Monday, the couple is back in their rented house with zero balance, wondering about charcoal.

Funerals are worse. They’re now high-budget productions. People who never sent money for hospital bills chair the burial committee. Budgets cover sound systems, five tents, city caterers in the village, and gold-handled caskets. Thirty Subarus and Harriers burn fuel like water to Budaka or Masaka. We can’t afford healthcare alive, but we’ll spend millions for a luxury send-off.

Church completes the cycle. The same people dodging landlords Saturday show up Sunday in designer suits, cars running on fumes. Celebrity pastors say your business is failing because your tithe lacks “spiritual weight,” then ask for a 500k “prophetic seed.” A man owing school fees will empty his pocket at the altar, convinced a miracle will hit his Mobile Money by Monday.

School fees season is psychological warfare. A kindergarten circular reads like a national budget. Beyond tuition, parents must bring army-sized toilet paper, brooms, reams of paper, and sugar. Graduates haul brooms like herbalists. We curse the schools, but opening day brings a traffic jam of fuel-guzzlers dropping off kids with snacks for a village. We pay because an expensive school is 70% education, 30% status.

Kampala survives on side hustles, selective broke-ness, and rotating debt. No one lives on salary alone. The HR manager imports iPhones by 2 PM. We move landlords to tears over rent, then spend 250k on concert tickets that night. Money just circulates from Airtel Money to MTN Mobile Money. Everyone owes everyone.

Kampala squeezes you with potholes and power cuts, then a friend calls with “two mutual bottles on the table.” We’re broke, stressed, and in the red. But with God’s grace, good music, and Ugandan audacity, we survive.

Which Kampala “scam” is draining you most: corporate loans, wedding committees, school requirements, or celebrity pastors?

✍🏼: Deox

[TheKingWalker II @AMuhindo]

@wekesa_amos @RwenzoriMarathn For all your refurbished container design units. Delivery to site in any location.

[TheKingWalker II @AMuhindo]

@wekesa_amos Reach out for your prefabricated housing solutions [phone]

[TheKingWalker II @AMuhindo]

@BushHerbert1 @MukasaMulya @nssfug Nssf guaranteed annual interest rate is 2.5%. Its safe to calculate using this figure not 12%

[TheKingWalker II @AMuhindo]

Do you remember when you joined X? I do! #MyXAnniversary

[Kathryn @Kathrynwaspice]

@SpireJim Still relevant.

[Fahad Nyonjo King @kingFahad_17]

Let's wrap it up 🫱🏾‍🫲🏾 with akeshongololo

[𖣂JIK𖣂 @OS3992]

People are going to doubt you.
They won’t see what you see.
They’ll question your vision, you can't let them control you or your future

[Carol Primah @IamCarolPrimah]

No one should talk about my shinning forehead.😒 Just visited @Aldea_Kla for Kampala Restaurant Week and got 10% off with my Stanbic Visa Card.

#PayWithFlexiPay || #StanbicVisaCard

[NSSF Uganda @nssfug]

Plan for long-term expenses wisely. Avoid using your retirement savings for ongoing costs like mortgage payments or school fees. Retirement savings are meant to support you throughout retirement. Protect your future by keeping your savings intact and budgeting for big expenses from your regular income or other dedicated funds. #NSSFRegionalMeetings

[TheKingWalker II @AMuhindo]

Do you remember when you joined X? I do! #MyXAnniversary

[Kampala’s Finest🇺🇬 @kampalasfinest_]

Who did this?

[Fabrizio Romano @FabrizioRomano]

🚨🔙 Paul Pogba can officially play pro football again from today, still available as free agent.

His ban is definitely over.

[Nahabwe Bruce @brucenahabwe1]

If it appears on your TL just retweet.

Let’s stand together for Dr Kizza Besigye and all political prisoners.
#FreeKizzaBesigye

[Nalugwa Lilian Mamito ❤️ @nalugwa_lilian]

Just repost.
#FreeKizzaBesigye

[Dr. Kasenene @drkasenene]

All men need to read this.

Testosterone is the “man hormone”.

It’s what makes men feel like men.

The more testosterone the more a man develops muscle, feels confident, wants to conquer the world, find a WOMAN & have children.

If you don’t have enough, problems start.🧵

[🇿🇦#SouthAfricanFirst🇿🇦 @Roel6825008]

Most people we blame #M23Rebels but after Listening to him 👇#SANDF must come back home.#Ramaphosa sellout our brothers and sisters

[Dr. Bireete Sarah @SarahBireete]

President Uhuru Kenyatta akoze atya 😊👏👏

I saw some people the other day crying .. Trump has removed money; he said he is not giving us anymore money .. why are you crying? It’s not your money 😂😂

#BakozeBatya