chet

[Zab @oktwann]

found pickles in my burger

[Jett ♛ @iky_fwjett]

i understand that my body can’t digest corn or whatever. that’s fine. my issue is that i fucking chewed it. how the hell is it coming out back in the shape of corn. what are they not telling us

[Mark @AgingRanchHand]

Uber sends notifications like "hey want to take an Uber right now?" No thanks, buddy. It's more for when I need to go somewhere

[Sun Devil Football @ASUFootball]

SUN DEVIL NATION.

[Nate @dodgernate]

Greatest postseason performance ever.

[𐕣 @doyenmxn]

I think my mom likes arguing with me because I look like my dad

[Arizona Cardinals @AZCardinals]

Kyler with the Power Slap celly 😭

@budlight | #forthecelly | @powerslap

[Pitless @pitlessball]

2012 Jamal Crawford bag work

[Jeremy Hecht @Jeremy_Hecht]

taking your side piece to a public concert... that's a cold play

[ugly fugly @lilemzivert]

“diet coke is just a fridge cigarette” is the type of poetry i live for

[Richard John @RichardJohn]

“top picks for you”

[‏ً @omgsidewalks]

lately i’ve noticed everybody looks OKAY until you have a deep conversation with them. and then, you’ll realize that this is a sad generation of people struggling to survive through smiling faces and pretty pictures

[Anthony @natolisnuggets]

If you woke up today and:

-Have a job where you can make money
-Have your health
-Can call both your parents
-Have access to food & water
-Can go move your body & sweat

It's a good day regardless of what your brain is trying to tell you.

[Keara Sullivan @superkeara]

When someone has “Do Not Disturb” on it’s like oh ok I didn’t realize the great philosopher was in their hour of seclusion pardon me for even daring to enter their precious mind palace

[dinosaur @dinosaurs1969]

post office employees when you ask them to do anything