Alex Marie

I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.

[Alex Marie @AlexxxMarie]

@SugarFireSmoke Mac and cheese hits different

[neen @neenaab3]

Your son made me take plan b after we hooked up but carry on

[Alex Marie @AlexxxMarie]

@GovParsonMO Fuck you

[Stephanie Bruce @Steph_Rothstein]

Racism is real and toxic. And if it’s uncomfortable for you to acknowledge ask yourself why you might be so resistant? We change things by supporting our black communities, who don’t benefit from privilege by highlighting their efforts, by not avoiding race discussions with kids.

[Abbi Crutchfield @curlycomedy]

I honestly think we are asking too much of cauliflower.

[Josh Gondelman @joshgondelman]

It is fucked up that no matter how good a pie smells, it won’t actually make you float up off the ground when you smell it.

[Barstool Sports @barstoolsports]

10 year anniversary of Pete Weber giving us the greatest bowling moment off all time

WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE, I AM

[Women's Humor @womenshumor]

Sports

[Alex Marie @AlexxxMarie]

*breastfeeding*

[Women's Humor @womenshumor]

Having a desk job be like...

[Alex Marie @AlexxxMarie]

@roachmalone They’re owned by the same company so I’m sure they’re exactly the same 😂

[Colin R @98Crob]

Today I was effectively fired from Gulf Shores Restaurant in Edwardsville. One of the cooks was sexually harassing (both verbally and physically) one of our coworkers and I refused to work with him. I gave the owner the choice of either firing me or the cook and they chose me.

[Alex Marie @AlexxxMarie]

@dannylulek It’s a part of getting older, Dan 😭

[Alex Marie @AlexxxMarie]

@JackBox forgot to give me my eggroll today. You can’t do that to a pregnant woman.

[Alex Marie @AlexxxMarie]

@jjhump311 Or when they ask for a plus one when you know they aren’t dating anyone.

[Alex Marie @AlexxxMarie]

@tiarachel91 and saying China pot 😂😂 I cannot

[Alex Marie @AlexxxMarie]

@BachParadise more @WellsAdams please.

[Alex Marie @AlexxxMarie]

KFC chicken sandwich > Popeyes chicken sandwich. Extra pickle.

[Alex Marie @AlexxxMarie]

Let’s fast forward through September. August and September are the armpits of the year. I’m tired of sweating.

[Alex Marie @AlexxxMarie]

@CBest24 Probs hormones but I was crying