Andrew Lee

Photographs, Poetry, Problems with both.

[Andrew Lee @Andrew_Lee_pic]

https://t.co/nXwgoq8WvA

[soggy broccoli @soggybrocoli]

just went to someone else’s circus and my fucking monkeys were there

[Andrew Lee @Andrew_Lee_pic]

The moon came back.. get yourself a house robot and relax.

[Cat Damon @CornOnTheGoblin]

"You promise you didn't get me bees again"
[me from a distance] just open it

[jizzlane maxxxwell @dankcharnley]

What is your favorite movie about lamb silence?

[tanya @Tanya_Sabrinaaa]

urgent my 8 maids a milking have unionized

[Barely Baked Beans @BarelyBeans]

It takes one badger to make a traditional shaving brush but the workmanship is questionable.

[Trudi @Trudski2012]

In this heat don't forget to leave a bowl of piss out for Bear Grylls

[Andy Goddard @SoundOfAGoddard]

Absolutely incredible line on LBC from a caller.

“The prospect of a new conservative PM is like seeing a menu of diseases and having your dad order for you”

[💀SpookyLittleComic👻 @CunniLinguist77]

No, autocorrect, I am not looking for local pubes

[RobotRowboat™ @robotrowboat]

[reinventing the whale] smaller

[Andrew Nadeau @TheAndrewNadeau]

date: so how did you lose your hand?

captain hook: a sword fight with my mortal enemy

date: ooo, that sounds sexy. who’s your mortal enemy?

captain hook: this fuckin orphan

[Christyna Moore @ChristynaUnless]

Interviewer: Can you explain the gap in your resume?
Me: It was then that I carried you

[Andrew Lee @Andrew_Lee_pic]

@JotaBelieveIt Ynwa

[Andrew Lee @Andrew_Lee_pic]

@TWEnclosure Kranjcar.. 🤣

[FᎪᎢ ᏩᎪNᎠᎪᏞF @sofarrsogud]

Nobody:

Absolutely nobody:

Me: If I was The Invisible Man, my pronouns would be who/where

[Andrew Nadeau @TheAndrewNadeau]

A plant sitting in a movie theatre, everyone groans as he opens his big tub of sunlight.

[fredesque @FredTaming]

me: this is my grandmother's favorite painting of a cottage in the woods

inventor of puzzles: i hate it