Nnaemeka

this acct is PO rooted | All for Manchester United❤️| Electrical Engr. | Gadget vendor

[Fabrizio Romano @FabrizioRomano]

🚨🔵⚪️ Napoli made contact with Gabriel Jesus camp over possible move, as @geglobo reported.

Discussions started while Arsenal insist on permanent move as only way for exit.

He’s now represented by same agency as Napoli head coach Allegri.

[Kemi @iksly2]

When I finished NYSC, I joined a network marketing business. The company was called Longrich.

It was exactly what you are thinking.😂

You register, bring in people, sell products, earn commissions from sales and referrals. A classic pyramid style structure.

I put everything into it. Because I wanted to enjoy the perks 😂

I ran seminars.
I traveled across the East to host events.
I was working toward targets that would qualify me for trips and even a car.

I never got to that level.

No car. No international trip😭

But then COVID happened.

I had to quit and focus on family.

2 years later, I started learning a tech skill and that's the best thing that has ever happened to me

So if you are just finishing NYSC and wondering what to do next, here is my honest advice.

Learn any marketing skill.

It could be email marketing, copywriting, social media marketing, marketing operations, funnel building etc.

Marketing teaches you how value moves. It teaches you how to communicate, how to sell ideas, and how businesses actually make money.

If you lockin for 2-3 months you won't be bothered about unemployment in Nigeria

Ok bye

[Bello Saleh, PhD بيللؤ ساليح۔ @bellosaleh]

NIGERIAN STRAWBERRIES

Nigeria built the strawberry value chain on a runway..the plane left! Now the harvest has nowhere to go.

We’ve entered strawberry season (November - February) with no credible way to move berries out of Jos.

For years, Arik was the only lifeline. In our own operations, we paid more per kg in air cargo than we paid farmers per kg of produce. Logistics cost more than the fruit, and we still paid for it, because at least the berries arrived fresh and wholesome across the country.

But overnight, it collapsed, Arik stopped flying into Jos (Oct 2025). ValueJet is now the only carrier flying out from Jos, and they refused to carry strawberries.

So today, Nigeria has strawberries, but Nigeria cannot move strawberries.

So you would suggest using the road? Only if you’ve never tried it.

Fresh strawberries survive 1–4 days at room temperature. That is the entire window.

On our last attempt by road, we used Styrofoam boxes (additional cost), packed ice for 48 hours, turned prayer warrior against checkpoint delays and rough roads, but still lost 20–30% to sweating fruit, broken boxes, heat pockets and delays. You can’t get any refund, just absorb the losses and move on.
Road is not a solution today. It’s a controlled disaster.

One question from a farmer tells the whole story.

“Should I harvest, or let it rot so the loss impact is smaller?”

Peak harvest is here (15–30 tons/hectare), but farmers are debating whether picking their crop is the bigger loss. This is what a system failure sounds like, not some headlines or reports.

And this is not only a cold chain issue, the flaw runs deeper.

Nigeria built production without securing logistics, food security is logistics security. We’re not losing strawberries because farmers don’t know how to grow them, we’re losing them because a berry’s entire value chain depended on a plane we didn’t control.

If Plateau produces ~700 tons this season and we lose 50% due to lack of movement, 350 tons will rot in 120 days. By April, Lagos will import strawberries, puree and concentrate while fresh berries rot in Jos.

This season will decide whether Nigeria has a strawberry industry or just a strawberry harvest.

But this is the conversation Nigeria avoids, we celebrate yields without asking how food moves across the value chain, we talk about food security while losing food to logistics, not production, we push “value addition” while value dies at the farm gate, long before processing ever begins.

Strawberries are just the clearest example of a delicate fruit with a 4-day lifespan exposing a national blind spot.

However this isn’t a tragedy waiting to happen. It’s a test.

If harvest only creates beauty on the Plateau and scarcity in Lagos and the rest of the country, the numbers will speak louder than any report.

At the end of four months, one question will remain. What is the value of production if we cannot deliver the product?

Until we answer that honestly, we will keep planting pride and harvesting loss.

Copied.

@NGRPresident @nassnigeria
@FmardNg
@PLSGov
@CalebMutfwang

[THE KINE 🌕🖤 @asher_kine]

PART 2 - may the stars align in your favour. 🌕🖤

[David Hundeyin @DavidHundeyin]

Back in 2012 when I lived in Bradford, I applied for the Standard Chartered Nigeria management trainee program and my first round interview was in Manchester. I literally drove an hour up the M62 to attend an interview at Deansgate for a job in Lagos (I didn't make it past that stage because I had no NYSC yet).

This wasn't our parents' experience sometime in 1976 - this was 2012. Literally 5 minutes ago. Yet if you tell someone in Nigeria today that barely 12 years ago, along with my entire friend group of Nigerian international graduates in the UK, I voluntarily returned to Nigeria in search of a better life, it will sound absurd.

Meanwhile over the same period, my Chinese housemates from uni have been exploring the world, earning full value for their labour, and living their best lives. Up until around 2017, they used to occasionally still invite me to join them on their latest group trip to Bangkok or Phnom Penh or Jakarta.

But here we are. I was having a chat with a (foreign) friend this morning complaining about Nigeria's economic situation and she told me that it's been a boon for remote employers because they now know that high quality Nigerian talent is available on the cheap.

Apparently her Nigerian contractors get paid $500/month and they're happy for the job. These are grown men with families. My proposed training allowance as a 24-year-old cadet pilot back in 2014 (no CPL/PPL, no hours, no type rating, nothing) was $1,200/month.

It's the most frustrating thing in the world having to navigate Nigeria's information asymmetry because you can be sure that there will be dozens of people in the comments who are hearing of all this for the first time. Nigerians are the only people in the world who are so information-resistant that they can experience the economic boom of a lifetime with obvious signs in their own lives, but you have to convince them that they are experiencing good times and they shouldn't pour petrol over everything and burn it down.

And sometimes despite your entreaties, they still vote for the real life Col. H. Stinkmeaner from Daura to come and destroy their own widespread prosperity, because a white guy from Washington paid some yellow beret or hijabi-wearing numpties to tell them that their prosperity is "fuelled by corruption" and "caused by high oil price."

I don't see any hope.

[Chef Human™ @WildChefHuman]

I promise, I’m not where I want to be, but maybe someone somewhere will read this and never give up because I didn’t.

I haven’t
This is not a pretty testimony

In 2019, I set out to set up one of my ideas; an open-kitchen restaurant, that would redefine dining

[໊ @sonohoor]

my favorite game is to guess if my headache is due to dehydration, migraine, malnutrition, stress, lack of sleep, poor position or a brain tumor

[Alex Onyia @winexviv]

I promised I will share a detailed technical report of what happened after our review with JAMB core system.

Carefully read it please…

JAMB 2025 UTME Technical Review Report

On Tuesday, the 14th of May 2025, a high-level technical review session was convened at the Joint Admissions and Matriculation Board (JAMB) headquarters in Abuja. The meeting, presided over by the esteemed Registrar, Professor Ishaq Olanrewaju Oloyede, was initiated in direct response to the mass outcry that followed the release of the 2025 Unified Tertiary Matriculation Examination (UTME) results the previous Friday. The objective of this gathering was to unravel the root causes behind the unexpectedly poor candidate performance and to establish clear mitigative measures to restore confidence in the integrity of the UTME assessment process.

The meeting began promptly at 10:00 a.m. and was attended by a distinguished panel of stakeholders. Present were heads of key directorates within JAMB, and Lead Systems Analysts. Also in attendance were delegates from the CBT Centre Regulatory Committee, representatives from the Educare Technical Team, and lead engineers from the consortium of software vendors responsible for the examination engine infrastructure.

Discussions commenced with a comprehensive analysis of the existing system architecture. The panel reviewed the software stack powering the CBT engine, paying particular attention to how examination content was delivered to candidates. An important distinction was made between server-streamed and locally cached delivery methods.

The discussion further investigated the existence and efficacy of randomization mechanisms for both questions and answer options. This scrutiny was aimed at determining whether shuffling protocols were uniformly enforced, how answer permutations were managed, and if consistency of correct answer mapping was maintained across candidates following randomization.

Attention then shifted to the scoring and marking logic. This line of inquiry included assessing the capability of the system to reconstruct question-and-answer mappings and evaluate response accuracy with complete transparency. It was critical to determine if each candidate’s raw responses were stored, retrievable, and auditable.

The team also rigorously examined JAMB’s quality assurance and testing frameworks. This involved reviewing the load testing procedures previously employed, verifying the consistency of deployment builds across centres, and probing whether any last-minute hotfixes or patches were applied during or after the examination period. System logs, particularly incident and error records, were meticulously analyzed to identify any anomalies that could suggest failures in content delivery, timing accuracy, or candidate response capture.

Another focal point of the review was *the potential for human factor influence* . The panel sought clarity on whether any manual post-processing occurred during score collation or validation. The conversation concluded with an assessment of JAMB’s response readiness to Freedom of Information requests and its willingness to publish anonymized candidate-level result data as a measure to enhance public trust.

*One of the most critical discoveries* made during this session revolved around *three* major systemic changes introduced in the 2025 UTME. The first was a shift from the traditional *count-based analysis* to a more robust *source-based analysis* of results. In previous years, JAMB evaluated the integrity of examination sessions primarily by counting the number of responses submitted per session. If the majority of candidates in a session of 250 submitted a near-complete set of answers, the session was deemed valid. Any significant deviation led to disqualification of that centre’s results. However, in 2025, a more advanced model was adopted—one that focused on the actual source and logic of the answers provided, rather than just their quantity.

The second change involved *full-scale shuffling of both questions and answer options* . This ensured that even two candidates sitting in the same session would not receive identical permutations, thereby enhancing test security. The third change was *a series of systemic improvements aimed at optimizing performance and reducing lag* during exam sessions. This was a major policy change that saw the best and highest Obtained UTME score in 15 years. And this would have amounted to a great achievement by JAMB!

While these improvements were technologically sound in theory, a major operational flaw was uncovered during the implementation phase. The system patch necessary to support both shuffling and source-based validation had been fully deployed on the server cluster supporting the KAD (Kaduna) zone, but it was not applied to the LAG (Lagos) cluster, which services centres in Lagos and the South-East. This omission persisted across all sessions until the 17th session, after which the error was discovered and corrected.

As a result, approximately 92 centres in the South-East and 65 centres in Lagos—totalling 157 centres—operated using outdated server logic that could not appropriately handle the new answer submission/marking structure. This affected an estimated 379,997 candidates, whose results were severely impacted due to system mismatches during answer validation.

To verify the scale and accuracy of this issue, JAMB collaborated with the Educare Technical Team, which had gathered response data directly from over 18,000 candidates. After deduplication and filtering, about 15,000 authentic records were analyzed. Of these, more than 14,000 originated from the regions serviced by the unpatched LAG servers, confirming the technical review's findings. Comparative analyses between JAMB’s internal audits and third-party system evaluations revealed significant overlap, reinforcing the conclusion that the affected centres were indeed operating under impaired conditions.

In response to these findings, Professor Oloyede convened a press briefing at 3:00 p.m. on the same day. He formally acknowledged the oversight and issued a sincere apology to candidates and their families. He announced that all affected candidates would be given the opportunity to retake the examination at no additional cost. Furthermore, recognizing the potential scheduling conflict with ongoing SSCE examinations, JAMB had reached an agreement with the West African Examinations Council (WAEC) to ensure seamless coordination of timetables.

Affected candidates were advised to reprint their examination slips by Friday, 17th May 2025, to confirm their revised test schedules. JAMB also released an official communique titled *MAN PROPOSES, GOD DISPOSES*, within which as a Profound, emotional Section: *“Appeal, Appreciation, and Apology,”* which reiterated its commitment to fairness, transparency, and continuous improvement.

This review, conducted with thoroughness and transparency, signifies JAMB's resolve to uphold the sanctity of its examination processes. Going forward, stronger deployment validation protocols and real-time monitoring mechanisms will be implemented to prevent such oversights.
In summary, JAMB opened its systems to independent reviews to restore public confidence and ensure the reliability of the UTME for all stakeholders. And we hereby report, that this incident was neither a system failure nor administrative manipulation, but an outright human error.

~
Educare Tech Team,
As submitted by
Engr James Nnanyelugo

[Z @70133x]

I’m sorry but this gorilla debacle is as close to old Twitter as we’re getting rn, I’m in tears

[Inibehe Effiong @InibeheEffiong]

QUADRI ALABI, TEEN WHO STOOD IN FRONT OF PETER OBI’S CONVOY REGAINS FREEDOM FROM KIRIKIRI MONTHS AFTER BEING FRAMED FOR ARMED ROBBERY BY LAGOS POLICE

We are excited to announce that Quadri Yusuf Alabi, the 17-year old teenager who gained fame during the 2023 elections after he spontaneously jumped and stood in front of the convoy of the presidential candidate of the Labour Party, Mr. @PeterObi, has been freed by the court today, 17th April, 2025.

Our client, Quadri was abducted by two ‘Area Boys’ who are notoriously known in the community as Lege and Baba Waris close to his family residence at Amukoko, Ajeromi-Ifelodun Local Government Area and dumped at the Amukoko Divisional Police Headquarters (Pako Police Station) in Lagos State.

Quadri was returning from work when he was grabbed by the duo, who along with other jealous and entitled Area Boys in the community, have been harassing him and threatening to deal with him since 2023 for not giving them ‘their share’ of donations gifted him during the last elections period.

Quadri’s family informed us that the Baale of the community equally pressured them to buy a cow and rice and cook for the community to appease the Area Boys.

The abductors initially told the officers at Amukoko Police Station that our client was involved in street fighting.

To the consternation of Quadri and his family, the police on 26th January, 2025 took Quadri before a Magistrate in Apapa, and obtained an order remanding him at the Medium Security Custodial Centre, Kirikiri on a trumped-up charge of armed robbery.

The police fraudulently joined Quadri with four strange adults who had no form of connection or relationship whatsoever with him and claimed that the four strange men were his case mates.

As part of the diabolical frame-up of our client, the officers at Amukoko Police Station also misrepresented his age to be 18, knowing that disclosing his actual age would likely raise eyebrows.

When we were briefed by Quadri’s mother a week ago, after the matter was brought to public attention by Ms. Hassana Nurudeen, the Co-founder of Ray of Hope Prison Outreach (@Hausa_girl), we swiftly escalated the case and took necessary steps towards securing his freedom.

At the Court today, the presiding Magistrate, His Honour, A. O. Olorunfemi (Mrs.), confirmed that the legal advice issued by the Director of Public Prosecutions (DPP), of the Ministry of Justice, Lagos State, Dr. Babajide Martins showed that there was no evidence to substantiate the allegation of armed robbery against Quadri.

In his Legal Advice, the DPP recommended the non-prosecution of Quadri. Thus, the presiding Magistrate discharged him and he was accordingly freed.

We commend the DPP for standing by the truth in this matter.

We demand that the Commissioner of Police, Lagos State Command, and the Inspector General of Police, should as a matter of urgency, remove the DPO of Amukoko Divisional Headquarters and subject him to orderly room trial along with the IPO, one Inspector Odigbe Samuel, and other officers who participated in this evil, sinister, oppressive, and corrupt scheme of framing-up a teenager for armed robbery at the behest of rogue ‘Area Boys’.

We demand that the Nigeria Police Force should pay the sum of One Hundred Million Naira (N100,000,000.00) to our client as compensation.

Also, we also demand a public apology from the police.

If the above three remedial demands are not fully complied with immediately, we shall initiate legal actions to seek redress.

Quadri’s case is a painful example of the putrefying corruption, monstrous impunity, and pervasive injustice in the Nigeria Police Force.

There are many Quadris languishing in detention centres across Nigeria because of the unbridled criminality, lawlessness, and lack of accountability in the Police institution and the weakness of the justice system.

History will vindicate the just.

Signed:

INIBEHE EFFIONG, ESQ.
(Lead Counsel).

[EnergyUp @EnergyUp_]

GET BIGGER ARMS IN 30 DAYS (HOME WORKOUT)

[Savn Daniel @savndaniel]

Today has been quite soulful for me.

I went to the Magistrate Court today, from thence, I went to the Cyber Crime Unit of the Nigeria Police, then had a long day interviewing inmates at the custodial center.

The first person I interviewed admitted to committing the Offence

[Your Designer @Daviowhite]

If you’re looking to learn about Figma and UI design, I have 100+ videos for you on YouTube link below

[THE KINE 🌕🖤 @asher_kine]

goodluck to mr. tunde and my boi saka. ❤️

[DR-TGb🏄🏿‍♂️-iSellWears👟👔🧢 @alt_tgbwears]

Nysc camp is where you’ll see the most random nigga with a lot of money

Funny room fr

[Chris Fore @chriscfore]

39 years ago tonight, 12/19/85, I went to bed about 9 pm. An hour later than normal. I was 9. Dad wasn't home yet. Which was weird. Because it always took about 25-30 mins to drive home from San Marcos to Fallbrook after he called mom to say he was on his way.

[Amos Ade @territorial_god]

I was scheduled an interview for an oil and gas company on a Saturday, due to just starting out the previous Monday in a bank's Academy, I couldn't travel (skip work) a day earlier, had to book an early morning flight same Saturday.

This will be my first flight experience.

[PAPA EJIMA NKE Ozubulu 💊💊 @emeka_ozubulu]

My boy is no more a boy,nwata etogo!!!

[David Hundeyin @DavidHundeyin]

The year is 2049.

China and the NATO federation are in the 15th year of their thermonuclear war which at this point is entirely fought by drones and AI since all the humans have died. Most of Europe and the Mainland United States lie in smoldering ruins. Asia is just a smoldering hole in the ground and Africa's population has dropped by 95% after nuclear winter reduced its average temperature by 45°C. The surviving 5% is mainly Nigerians and cockroaches because those ones will survive anything, even if they don't really know why.

Those who can afford it lie asleep in special long-term cryogenic sleep chambers designed to preserve their bodies and consciousness for 200 years, which is enough time for the earth to recover from the radiation and support life once again.

The uber elite who can afford the annual subscription fee of 5 billion NATO Accounting Units are able to keep their minds active during this time by transferring their consciousness to X Premium, which is now an electronic universe ruled by the permanently digitized consciousness of the Eternal Emperor and Supreme Founder ♔☬, Formerly Known By The Name Of Elon Musk.

Ordinary cryo-sleepers are allowed to transfer their consciousness to X Blue for up to 60 seconds once every 11 years. If they don't like it, they should just be rich tnen. Or they can leave the cryogenic chamber altogether and go become like the Nigerians who are still surviving outside after the radiation mutation has given all of them 3 heads and 2 penises.

Aisha Yesufu's digitized consciousness stirs from its 11-year cryogenic sleep for its one minute of free X time. It quickly hits the "Compose Post" button and races against the 60-second timer to post an urgent message of importance to anyone who might see it later. It hits the "post" button just before the timer expires and her cryogenically preserved face smiles as her digitized consciousness drifts back to its electronic hibernation for another 11 years.

The message reads:

"Goodluck...Jonathan...was a failure."