Had a parent-teacher conference this morning
My wife told me not to come
I came anyway
She said "please just listen and nod"
I said "I always listen"
She said "you listen like you're sitting in a boardroom looking for something to challenge"
That's how listening works
Nice classroom
Small chairs
I am 6'4" and was seated at a desk designed for someone who still believes in Santa Claus
My knees touched my chest
The teacher introduced herself
Shared her identified pronouns
I shared my identified adjectives
Smart and handsome
My wife closed her eyes
The teacher had a folder
Color-coded tabs
I respected the organization
She said our son is "a pleasure to have in class"
My wife smiled
I waited
That sentence is never the whole report
It's the executive summary before the risk section
She said "however"
There it is
She said he "asks a lot of questions"
I said "good"
She said "during quiet time"
I said "when is quiet time?"
She said "it's when students are expected to work independently and in silence"
I said "so he's the only one trying to get information and you've structured the environment to prevent it?"
My wife put her hand on my arm
I continued
The teacher said he recently told another student that "sharing pencils doesn't make sense if nobody brings their own"
I said "that's an accurate observation"
My wife squeezed harder
The teacher said she's concerned about his "resistance to group activities"
I said "he's not resistant. He just doesn't see the value of doing more work for the same grade."
The teacher said he also corrected her math on the whiteboard
I said "was he right?"
She paused
She said "that's not the point"
I said "it's a little bit the point"
My wife stood up
Sat back down
Compromise
The teacher pulled out an evaluation sheet
Categories like "works well with others" and "follows directions" and "respects classroom norms"
All subjective
Not a number on the page
I asked how these are graded
She said "based on observation"
I said "so one person's opinion with no second review?"
She said "it's professional judgment"
I said "my auditors say that too. Right before I disagree with them."
She looked at my wife
My wife said "I'm sorry about him"
I said "I'm sitting right here"
My wife said "I know"
The teacher said overall he's a bright kid and she just wants to make sure he learns to "collaborate"
I said "collaboration is important. But so is recognizing when you're the only one doing the work. He'll learn that again in college. And again in the real world. Might as well start now."
Nobody spoke
The teacher closed her folder
She said "I think we've covered everything"
I said "one more thing"
She braced herself
I said "his reading is above grade level. His math is strong. He asks hard questions and corrects mistakes when he sees them. I just want to make sure this school knows what it has."
The teacher looked at me differently
My wife looked at me differently
I said "that's all"
We left
In the car my wife was quiet
Then she said "he's turning into you"
I said "is that a good thing?"
She didn't answer
From the backseat he said "dad, why does the teacher count off for asking questions? Isn't that the whole point of school?"
I looked at my wife
She looked out the window
I said "yes. It is."
He said "I don't think she likes when I'm right"
I didn't say anything
Neither did my wife
Small chairs
Color-coded tabs
No follow-up items
But the kid's going to be fine
Sent from my iPhone
I love meeting self-aware people.
You don’t have to tiptoe around them because they speak their mind. You don’t have to inflate their ego because they know their worth. And you don’t have to pretend to be perfect because they also know they're flawed.
Rare but real.
10 yrs ago, I lost my first wife to breast cancer. I became a single dad (kids 8, 10, 12). I was lost & unsure about what lay ahead.
10 yrs later, I just retired at 53. Remarried to an amazing woman. Kids thriving.
If you are going thru a tough time, it will get better.⏳✝️💪
Don't try to time the market!
“Far more money has been lost by investors trying to anticipate corrections, than lost in the corrections themselves.”
- Peter Lynch
After a business degree, a law degree, 25 years of working, & the latest developments in generative AI, I can tell you this:
Send your kids to trade school.